Wow. I was one c-section scar away from hurling.
A dark, dirty looking (outside and in) single level building sits at the bottom of a badly maintained parking lot.
Sometimes referred to as the redheaded stepchild of strip clubs on rt 1, this place has very little to recommend itself. It's the cheaper option, compared to The Banana (which isn't a male strip club, nope. Deceiving, eh?)
I probably should've started out by saying I don't like strip clubs... Well, now that I've cleared the air? I was not impressed, and yes, I can compare this joint to others.
At one point I turned to one of the guys I was with "really, again, what's the point if she's not attractive AND she can't move in a way that is graceful or interesting?!" He said: "what? give her money, she's got kids. she told me!" While logic like this works for intoxicated people who find it "entertainment" to watch a naked stranger clack her clear plastic heels in their faces... I sat there unmoved. I have bills too, but I keep all my clothes on at work- reasons including but not limited to the fact that I wouldn't generally be found attractive naked, and am less than graceful.
I heard recently that this club was owned by the Angels (not the baseball team). I wouldn't be surprised if it were.
They have an ATM machine (surprised?), cheap beers, and a smaller (unused?) stage behind the bar. The ladies room was fairly clean (looking) considering the locale, but I was not inclined to touch any surface.
Used to work here. Â I think it's great. Â Fully nude stage and private dances. Â Private ones are air dances, as all fully nude dances should be (rubbing on people, naked, then having other people rub on them naked, then repeat? Â unsanitary, no thanks).
There's a large, looming bar on one side, and a stage on the other. Â And a small hidden stage in a room back behind the bar. Â I hated the back stage, as people rarely even noticed you were alive back there at all.
One star minus for having the world's shortest pole. Â Being a pole enthusiast, that really blew. Â And the tiny hidden back stage doesn't even have one at all. Â :(
Edit to add: I recall the food being pretty good.
i have been to this place probably about a dozen times. ive gone with straight friends, gay friends, people im sleeping with, co-workers, you name it; and, i always have a solid time. ive never bothered getting food here; but, really. im not here for food. im here to get drunk and look at naked women.
the drinks are over-priced of course, but theyve never caught me drinking in the parking lot either. so, ill chalk that up as a win.
there is a blonde girl with short-ish hair that seems to defy gravity on the pole. excellent. also, there was a delightful dark haired woman who i affectionately refer to as 'black widow jenna'. i dont even think her name is jenna, but i love her all the same. one of the girls even bought me a shot one night. i love this place.
final word; go here & bring me with you.
I've been here a bunch of times.The experiences have varied.I've been and all the dancers were not interesting in the least bit.Unattractive and boring.Other times there has been at least one girl that really knows how to put on a show.They had lots of character.A cool gimmick.It made my night.
The $13 pitchers of beer are the best bargain.Pizza is ok.
Sometimes they play lots of rap & r&b music.Which just isn't my style.
No cover charge sun,mon,tue
Cheaper than the Banana (across the street).But not as clean and classy.
My friends took me to Cabaret for my bachelorette party in mid-August. It was a Sunday night, maybe 10 people in the house other than us. We rolled about 20 deep and all saddled up to the stage.
The women were ALL gorgeous, IMO, but then, I think women are gorgeous. And all fine dancers, too. I imagine Sunday night isn't a prize shift, so at first some of these ladies rocked that bored look that we all get from working and not making any money.
AND THEN...
One woman came out, rocking a fedora, who rose to the occasion and was greeted with whistles and cheers and applause. And many many dollars. She worked the pole, she danced her ass off, she looked like she was having a great time. We were screaming, cheering her on. Â I threw down a twenty.
AND THEN...
This same amazing dancer (forgive me for forgetting your name) kicked off her platform heels and started doing CARTWHEELS. Â The story has become legend, which is saying a lot, since the crowd I rolled in there with are almost ALL dancers and who all definitely identify as sluts. We were in HEAVEN.
We gave those dancers so much love that the house started buying US drinks.
We had an amazing time. Thank you.
Excess and Ohs,
Sugar
Oh, yes. Â The Golden Banana's deformed twin brother: the Cabaret-- caterer to the most mundane strippers ever. Â Not one girl was attractive in there or gave a hard-on worthy performance. Â And as a man of low standards, that's a sorry statement to have to make. Â The girls in there are amateurs at best, and aspire to build their stripping ambitions at the wrong place. Â Though I rarely complain about a bathroom at a joint, I feel compelled to talk about the one at this place: it looks like a hotspot for heroin shooters. Â The vending machines in there are filled with cheap condoms and items you wouldn't normally find anywhere else (cock-rings? Â Really??). Â And to top it all off, it's seven bucks for a beer. Â Seven bucks a beer?? Â Are you kidding me or what? Â I'm trying to drink to save my night and perceive these excuse for erotic dancers as being slightly attractive, and the Cabaret won't even let me have that. Â So therefore, I recommend staying as far away as possible from this place, and boogie woogying on over to the Golden Banana across the street for a much better time.
Review Source:Ahhh the Scabaret. Â You will see an array of scabs here. Â I've had more disappointing nights then good nights here. Â The worst time was when I was with a more outspoken friend. Â The skeeviest, scabbiest dancer of the night, who couldn't dance made me laugh at first, but then it was just awkward. Â After she got off stage she litterally was standing behind me poking me in the neck saying "Get a dance, get a dance". Â They aren't supposed to pull guys paying dollars off the stage but this girl was all messed up on something, and she thought we were friends or something, I don't know what was up with her. Â We go to the private dance area and they have to stand a couple feet away from you. Â I was sitting there thinking "This is what you were pinch-poking me for, get me out of here" Â She was beat too. 2 stars.
Review Source:Bouncers and bartender were rude to me years ago so I have been hesitant to go back. They have s bit of the "tough guy" syndrome that club workers have. I worked in a club so I know all the signs. Needless to say I have ended up there for birthdays or special occasions but I never forgot the rudeness I encountered there and avoid going at all costs.
Review Source:I had the "pleasure" of being taken to the Cabaret Lounge for my birthday. Â It was a Tuesday evening, so I'm sure the atmosphere was much different from what it would have been like on a Friday or Saturday night. Â Nevertheless, I was actually pleasantly surprised by the place. Â The place felt cozy and inviting when I expected it to be sterile and disgusting. Â Again, maybe it was directly related to it being a weeknight and the crowd being small. Â Two dancers in particular, Gianna and Crystal, were very chatty (good or bad, depending on your frame of mind) but I found that to help me feel more at ease. Â And since there weren't a lot of folks sitting at the stage, there was quite a bit of one-on-one time where you could actually engage in some small-talk without feeling rushed. Â One dancer told me that she likes to eat Pop Tarts and macaroni & cheese. Â Another talked about her non-exotic dance background, which I found interesting given the resurgence of "reality" dance TV shows. Â They were friendly and it looked like they enjoyed what they were doing.
After cycling through the entire line-up of dancers, we decided to head down the street to the Squire in Revere. Â Now THAT was a big disappointment. Â Sterile? Check. Disgusting? Check. Â The whole having to go through a metal detector at the door ironically made me feel more tense and less safe. The dancers were also not as friendly and the energy that they exuded was that they were there to make a paycheck. I could go on, but I would much rather focus on the positive experience of the Cabaret.
So, we actually WENT BACK to the Cabaret just to be in the friendlier atmosphere. Â As soon as we sat down at different seats along the stage, the dancer who was on stage came by and said with a smile, "Hey, why'd you guys switch seats?" Â And then when it was the next dancer's turn, she also came over and asked the same question. Â It felt nice to be treated as a human being and not as a dispenser of dollar bills. Â Granted, the good dancers are there to make the clientele feel good, which in turn makes them more money. Â However, as our experience at the Squire revealed, many dancers don't go the extra mile when they simply think that showing a little skin is all it takes to make money.
While I don't see myself going out of my way to get back to the Cabaret Lounge except other than a special occasion, the place left me with a positive impression. Â For what it is, they do a decent job--at least they did on this quiet Tuesday night that we went there.
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