Yelp needs to add a "no stars" rating. The poor people of Topsfield are held hostage to this place. There is no other in-town place to get food. Maybe across the street but I think they're co-conspiritors.
Ok, so no competition, but THOP is just plain mean about it. Do they have a test kitchen in which they try to create the most inedible dishes? The pizza is the worst you will ever eat. Greasy, tastless. I mean, cold pizza is one of my favorite foods. I know not everyone agrees, but  this stuff is terrible hot. And once it cools and congeals?
How bad is this pizza? When is the last time you served pizza to an 8 year old who then looked at you in disappointment and said, "this isnt good"? Either eat the box or head down Rte 1 to Danvers and the 466 for a really good pizza.
My first review, which I will leave up, was left with the mindset of myself being what people call a "fan-boy" of this place. I grew up eating their pizza, and I have encountered people who say it's good, but too greasy. With that said, let's get to the updated review.
I'm basing this updated review only on an experience i had when I ordered a meatball sub. First off, they're not meatballs, they're meat pucks (like hockey pucks). And not just by shape, but also with how dense they are...and they're terrible. I was on a meatball craze for about a week or so, and I unfortunately got one from here...the worst meatball sub EVER. So why 3 stars? I love this place, and can't give it less than a 50%, so this review, and my first one, you probably cannot depend on all that well...too much conflict of interest involved here.
I still love their pizzas, whether if it's a Hawaiian, A vegetable, a salami and onion, or my favorite - Cheese.
The Topsfield House o'Grease is a local institution at this point, and although I don't generally eat there, every now and again I will go there with friends from Topsfield 'just for old time's sake'
Oddly enough , the one thing I would advise against eating there is the pizza!
Generally I go for a gyro or the pitsakki instead.