Dolly Madison Inn & Restaurant

Unrealized potential.  Apparently awash with FEMA cash from Hurricane Sandy, the owners were able to put windows and new siding on the building.  Inside there are a few improvements to the layout and a few new light fixtures.   Other than that, it's the same awful disaster as the old Dolly.

The old Dolly was a haven for power drinkers and locals who felt comfortable exceeding DWI sobriety levels as they careened off across the local golf club grass in an attempt to avoid the Madison PD.  The food was disgusting, the level of service awful, and a one eyed, obese bartender, who local legend has it, added a little "something extra" into unsuspecting females drinks then lured them upstairs.

The new Dolly.  Closed until just before the 4th of July.  Then proudly opened with all the fanfare that a hand scrawled road side sign "Open" can generate.  They squandered a real opportunity to gain some upscale traction by having a biker at the front door, mumbling about how much he hated "fags in red pants and yuppies"  Wonderful.  The interior is a bit better but after a quick look around it's just the same old tired disaster.

Drink prices are good and the IRS cheating system of manually calculating drinks and food is still firmly in place.  Imagine a bar three deep with customers, and bartenders and staff MANUALLY CALCULATING totals using note pads and calculators.  There is no POS system and this place clearly is trying to run under the taxman's radar.  

The urinals in the bathroom have no running water and the place gets to be smelling pretty awful as the evening grinds on.  

A potential gold mine, the Dolly is it's own worst enemy.  Even the pleasant back deck is a messy dumping ground for old and broken furniture and diners are forced to eat in complete darkness - they can't even get candles on the tables.  The perimeter lighting provided by flood lamps is harsh and reminiscent of a warehouse parking lot.

The Madison Beach Hotel only a block away must be breathing a sigh of relief as the Dolly staggers along, mismanaged and abysmally operated.  A Dolly with a functional GM could take a serious bite out of that place.  

In sum, cheap drinks, smelly awful bathrooms, dining in the dark, a biker at the front door, and by buying anything and paying cash, you are assisting the owners in continuing to cheat the IRS and the town of tax revenue (not that I mind stiffing the IRS, mind you).

TEN simple changes can be made to this business functional.

CLOSED

I can't tell if they're renovating or closed. Most likely they're closed for good because there's no sign or notice on the front door.

To be honest, it's really of little surprise for us locals. For a long time it was a Grade A location with a second rate restaurant and bar. I don't like snooty, pretentious, & pricey businesses but the location deserved a lot better than what the Dolly Madison offered. Hopefully the next business will be much better.

More than likely some New Yorker with more money than God will buy the property, shoe-horn the biggest McMansion into the tiny lot, and visit it only twice a year. That seems to be a common trend in the neighborhood.

Down to one star.

We called on a Monday afternoon at about 3:00 to inquire about renting one of the rooms upstairs to spend the night. We were in the mood to have maybe more than just a couple of drinks, walk along the water, and spend the night. Now, to be fair, we called two weeks after Memorial Day and the shoreline gets crazy during the summer season -- but here's what happened.

First call: the phone rang and rang. No voice-mail or anything. We looked at each other. I thought I'd mis-dialed; companion said out loud "maybe they had a fire or something."

Second call: "just a moment." Dead air. No crowd noises. I hung up after waiting about a minute.

Third call (or "three strikes you're out"): the same person answered the phone and said indeed there was room at the in. In fact, a lot of them. I asked to reserve one and that we'd be down in about an hour. This seemed to stump them; "please hold on" and the phone was set down on the bar. Hung up after three minutes, this time.

We tried to give them the benefit of the doubt. We really tried. This place is in an exquisite location and has a funky sort of charm to it, and we really wanted to love it.

It is my sincere hope that they do better handling the phone on busier days. Perhaps they'd had a heavy weekend and just had a skeleton staff on this particular Monday.

They embarassed me in my search for a wonderful hideaway to take the beloved one. In fact, beloved one commented on how lovely the setting was when I drove past to show what we were missing. We ended up staying at a B&B in Clinton which was just fine.

For my thougths on the dining experience there, please see my older review.