Checked out the comedy night last Thursday here. Decent bar with an unusual two room setup. One side is just totally bar and the other side has a stage for whatever. They had $4 captain and Coke on Thursday, but the comedy was the same pathetic amateurs telling fart jokes. Can't expect much for free. Patio was nice outside - too bad patio's can't have a non-smoking section. College bar.
Review Source:After sitting at a table for about ten minutes, I asked the bartender why the server was ignoring me, he said there was no server,even though she was clearly present. If you are unable to take my money, I will be more than glad to spend it elsewhere. If you have a secret ordering technique, let a motherfucker know. Sorry, the schedule of servers isn't posted on the wall,and as handsome as I am, I am not psychic. So in total, fuck you, fuck your ignoring ass server, fuck your bar, aand your schedule of servers, that apparently, everyone is supposed to know.
Review Source:This bar has quickly become my go-to since it's like, a 5 minute walk from my house..I can just stumble on home if I've had a few too many.
This place is really divey, and the decor is pretty comical. Pictures of teddy bears doing sports on one wall and portraits of naked ladies on the other...The vibe of the place is VERY fun. There's plenty of seating and they have a section where there's a stage for comedy and karaoke nights. And.. get this! They have GAMES! There's always something going on every night. I think they also do a night called Fancy Pants? I've been there once..not too sure it's a regular thing.
The drinks and food are great here. I can't speak for Burgers Across America (since I don't eat meat), but I've had plenty of things here..the cheese curds (omg delicious), veggie wrap and grilled cheese. Yum!
I have witnessed the 1am shirtless shots. What I have not seen are many ladies partaking in it. It's usually a lot of guys...haha.
Service is usually pretty prompt unless they are super busy. The staff is super friendly. Overall, I've never had a bad experience and I've been here several times.
So the place has Christmas lights, and a fair amount of ambiance, and supposedly there's a shirtless shot at 1:00 - which might make going back worth it. Â Other than that, the service was less than lackluster, the domestic kegs all seemed flat. Â In other words, go somewhere else unless it's 1:00 and you want to see some daytime nudity.
Review Source:if you want a a perfect gem that has all walks of life coming together around a local dive bar that is funky fresh MONKEY PANTS is the place for you!
Wednesdays never fails hilarious karaoke is always a riot, the drink specails are great too!
during day light hours it looks like nothing special but stop by the place around 10:45pm and its a a local spot filled with hipsters and tons of other people just down for a good time.
from 21- 65 perfect for all ages to just enjoy life and have a good laugh around at the live entertainment, hope to see you on wednesday night!
I'm a complete dive bar junkie. Whether I'm in a big city, or small town I always seek out the local spots. I was in Tempe with work and we happened to drive into town right at last call so we searched for the closest bar which just happened to be Monkey Pants. After we got over laughing at the name and the paint job on their truck...we went in and were greeted by the waitress right away. It wasn't too busy especially for a Friday night but the place is huge! The bartender was very attentive and adorable.
I really wish I could've made another stop at this bar before I went back home..I saw a bunch of posters for all these theme nights and great deals. Reading previous reviews it sounds like they have parties going on like this all the time. Great bar!
What a great venue! I went on a Thursday night for the free comedy and was pleasantly surprised at the turn out, the comedy, and the great vibe.
If you're not into comedy, don't worry! The location allows for two set up - one half of the place was a bar and the other was a stage for the comedy. When the comedy was over, they opened the place up again. It was great!
The service wasn't super amazing but it was typical for your bar scene. The prices were average and the food was just okay.
Show up on Thursday nights at 8:30pm, get some free entertainment, and enjoy this place!
I've drank here about 5x, played games about 6x, and ate here about 4x.
First off - I LOVE THE CHEESE CURDS. They are little greasy nuggets of joy. So if you don't like greasy food, these are the last thing you should order. But dang, they are awesome. :)
So, I like shuffleboard. Enough that I've played for shirts before (of which I won, by the way). When my opponent lost their shirt, Monkey Pants and any other patrons didn't even seem to mind. After all, they have a shirtless shot 1-2x a night anyways so it isn't completely uncommon to see shirtless people in here.
Drinks seem to be reasonable here as well, especially if you order some of their special drinks.
Food is pretty decent as well and I'd put it about one step above bar food in some cases.
I'm not sure how long they have been doing it... but they had a "power saver" night where they wouldn't use lights, but rather candles for their lighting. As stupid as it sounds, I REALLY loved it. The bartenders also dressed up and it ended up feeling like a speak-easy. Speaking of bartenders, they are pretty dang attentive. I think I've received some of the fastest service here.
Overall, I like this place. I wish I lived closer so I could just walk there. I could see this as being my local watering hole.
PS - They have a lot of board games too. So if you're looking to spice things up. Grab an old fashioned board game and have at it!
My experience with Monkey Pants takes place on a Thursday. I am a stand up comic and I love comedy, and Monkey Pants has grown into a great little room for people to see some great comedy.
If you haven't liked Monkey Pants before, try going back during a comedy show, and they have 3 dollar captain and cokes, and cheese curds that are pretty tasty. (probably not that healthy though)
(thursday night - @ 830 pm)
P.S. I've also been on trivia night, which was also fun, but I suck at trivia... soooo. If you're into trivia, you should go that night instead.
First of all, I'll start with the name. Â I originally thought that this was a children's clothing store. Â I don't like cutesy names for kid's clothing stores, so taking a name like that and applying it to a bar is enough to rile up the cranky old man inside of me. Â But I digress.
I came here on a date (her choice), and got there a few minutes before she did...so I ordered a whiskey and diet. Â The diet was flat. Â I found a table and sat down and was messing around on my phone while waiting. Â As I was viewing the 2011 Cardinals schedule on my phone, I saw something moving across the table out of the corner of my eye. Â It was a cockroach. Â
Anyways, once she got to the bar, we had a couple other mild disappointments. Â The waitress seemed scatterbrained for the first half of the time we were there. Â She bought us drinks that we didn't order, and didn't bring us ones that we did. Â However, after a while, she improved...I'm guessing that she was "in the weeds" as servers call it, when we got there. Â Not a big deal, but obviously not impressive.
The girl I was with ordered what they call a "vegetarian" quesadilla. Â I would have just called it a quesadilla. Â There's not really any veggies in it. Â Also, they are the only place I have ever been to that mentions Hepatitis on the menu, but they spelled it wrong. Â Misspellings on menus also rile me up, what can I say?
All said, this is a below-average bar in my opinion. Â I would go back, but only if a friend or someone wanted to go...not a recommendation in my book at all.
This is a dark, greasy, homely, neighborhood dive bar with semi-decent food. If you visit Monkey Pants with this in mind, you won't be disappointed...much.
I was encouraged to go to Monkey Pants to try their burger with peanut butter on it. Yes, peanut butter! I'm an adventurous eater, so sure; I'm game. Well...the burger was dry. I asked for it cooked Medium, but it came out Well (...with every drop of moisture cooked out of it). Also, there was no sauce on the burger of any sort; so just a dry, airy, flavorless bun and a way overcooked burger. Exacerbating the problem was this mouth-drying peanut butter on my burger. I felt like I was in one of those "Got Milk" commercials. Not good.
Conceptually, the "burgers across America" idea is sound, but the execution is not. The quality and attention to detail (and taste) is not there. The staff (of one) was friendly, but the service was a bit slow (because there was only one person). Monkey Pants is not a very clean place either. They did have Guinness on tap though, which almost earns them a 3rd star.... Still, I'm not really a fan. I don't intend on returning.
The ambiance is just ok but the people watching and entertainment factor on my night out made it ok to round up. Â I didn't try the food. Â
Out on a rather impromptu night out we stopped in here after 10pm on Easter Eve.  Anna M. had mentioned that their website said something about appearances from Jesus and the Easter Bunny, and sho' nuff as soon as we walk in I see a  Girl wearing an Bunny head and a Jesus in a corner offering the Stations -Trials that a faithful Monkey Pants patron could go through for a few shots and a t-shirt (Facing insults, washing Jesus' feet, drinking wine from a sponge, among other things).  Also as the clock hits 1am they have shirtless shots, where everyone who takes off their shirt is offered a shot.  Now its mostly the boys doing this.  Either way it is entertaining.   Â
This is definitely nothing fancy about this place. Â Just a down to earth slightly dive-y location where you can drink cold beer, have some food and play a little pool if you choose. Â I may have to go back and try their grub here soon....
I love dive bars and unlike many other dive bars, Monkey Pants is one with a younger crowd... one where you will not be the only person without an AARP card in your wallet. Â
The bartender looked like the main male character from (500) Days of Summer. Great. The drinks were cheap and strong. Even greater. This is probably the reason that I even thought the bartender looked like a quasi Joseph Gordon-Levitt.
Hands down, the BEST part of the night is when its time for 'free shots if you take off your shirt'. Â Ideally this is meant for the ladies of the bar. The reality, however, is much more entertaining. Suddenly there are dozens of shirtless men (who really shouldn't be shirtless in any circumstance) parading around the bar. Â Anyone first walking into the establishment would think they've entered a bad porno or some sort of explicit party. Â Its hilarious but unfortunately that image will be forever burned into my memory, regardless of how much alcohol was circulating throughout my nueral cavity.
I had to hold back one star only because the crowd is a bit to 'frat boy' esque for my liking. Although it is par for the course being located on Mill Ave near ASU campus.
I popped into Monkey Pants for my first time not long ago. I guess the best way to describe the environment is gloriously tacky. It was Christmas time so they had lights up, including the sexy leg lamp thingy from "A Christmas Story", a wood fireplace on TV and they were building a beer can Christmas tree. Picture the biggest beer castle ever. From the floor to the ceiling. Yes, gloriously tacky is a wonderful description.
The music her was mostly country and rock. Sorry, Lady Gaga fans. The crowd was very mixed. It seems many people from many different backgrounds come here to bask in Monkey Pants' soft, tacky glow. The drinks specials were good, the waitstaff was very attentive, and they had many TVs with various sports events on.
One of the coolest things about Monkey Pants is the boardgames. Who doesn't want cheap drinks and Battleship? I dare ye find such a man.
I didn't get a chance to look at the menu, but as a vegan bar food for me usually means peanuts or french fries.
Peanut butter on a hamburger.
Yep, you have read right. Â I had the Georgia Burger... peanut butter, american cheese, add the bacon.
Seriously, you have to, have to try this. Â I've seen this on food network several times, but haven't found a place that offers this fantastic combination.
Leave it to a place called Monkey Pants. Â Don't get me wrong, I had reservations about ordering this burger blissness. Â Not only that, but I couldn't not order something so random and full of potential. Â
One of the best burgers I've ever had. Â But seriously, Monkey Pants, I know you named the place just so it's hard to take you seriously... but mid afternoon on football Sunday and the bun was stale. Â Not just on my burger, but on my gal's burger too. Â
Come on Man! Â Oh wait, it wasn't Monday Night Football, but could have made the segment had Ditka experienced a burger cooked to order, and the ingredients so sinfully good. Â
My advice, order the burger, bring your own buns!
Peanut Butter Cheese Burger!
This is a great place to watch Sunday football. They have great drink specials and tons of TVs.
On their menu they have a collection of hamburger creations from around the USA. If you eat all of them you get a T-shirt, TP and Pepto.
My guy has decided to take on this challenge. He started with the most menacing...Georgia burger.
Ready:
Hamburger with American cheese and a huge scoop of creamy peanut butter.
Gross right??!!
NOPE. It was fabulous!! The flavors were perfect together, I would actually go back to order one again. You must try this very strange combo that is surprisingly so good and cooked to order.
The buns were VERY stale. If that is fixed you would have some really great burgers.
PS Get there for the 1:00pm Sunday shirtless shot!
I have been to Monkey Pants a few times now, mostly for drinks only. Â Recently I had a chance to eat some of the food so it's time to chime in on the full experience. Â I love the creativity of the place. Â Crazy promotions like, Fish races on Thursdays, shirtless shots at 1, wearing sombreros for discounted tacos and other similar wacky ideas make the atmosphere fun.The prices are reasonable and they always have great specials. Â They have a ton of burgers on the menu. My friends who have sampled them say they are very good. Â I have had the wings a few times and I have to say they are better than average. Â Recently I had the Spanking Monkey Sauce, Grilled. Â A combo of the BBQ and Buffalo sauce combined. Â Very Good. Â I have also had the Tacos, Although they are very generous with the taco meat, filling the shell more than halfway to the top. The taco meat itself was only average.
Another thing that was unfortunate for me and I am sure it was an isolated incident, but recently when I was there the service was below average.  Not that she wasn't trying, but our waitress was apparently working alone and it took over an hour and a half  from start to finish to eat a quick meal.  We waited an inordinate amount for service, delivery of order and check to arrive.  Other than that, but place was terrific. Go check it out for yourself.
Do I HAVE to give this place a star to post a review? Â Maybe .01 rounds up to 1 in yelp math . . . ?
Flat out, the place smells like ass . . . and not in a good way. Â There's this sour smell . . . not quite dumpster juice, but in the same ballpark. Â Maybe the bar was built on an indian sewage plant? Â The wings were ok, but unless somebody else was driving and I was incredibly drunk, I can't see myself ever going there again
Funny and just perfect for a Monday night!! I was honored to have a former student as my waitress and did enjoy all her recommendations. I liked the decoration and the music. This was the first place where I've tried a Michelov!
Enjoy the Mustache Mondays for half price drinks (even if it is fake!!).
Scale of 1-10 (single visit):
5 Food
5 *Drinks*
6 Service
8 Atmosphere
6 Value
I'll go back because it had a quirky-factor that I liked and b/c I need to try a burger to really gauge the food, but there were no drink specials (sorry, cheap "domestics" doesn't cut it) and my overpriced Frito Chili Pie wasn't good. Â The chili was below average and it used shredded cheese. Â Frito Chili Pies need nacho cheese. Â That's Frito Chili Pie 101. Â The service was also slow and uninformed, but she might have been new so maybe that'll come up too. Â Luckily the deep fried, bacon wrapped hot dogs saved the Food score a bit.
This place jets out some great vibes with its own semi-dive, pseudo punk hipster, quasi sports bar gig goin on. Anyone could fit in here and feel like the scene is just right for what you want. I was initially misled by their funky daily specials, thinking this place was more a fleshy, drunken, routy, sloppy cheap beer joint. Alas, the clouds have parted. I love the board games and have recently fallen in love with the shuffle board. Though the space between the pool tables and shuffle board is quite narrow, this makes for the creation of new friendships (or drunken aquaintences anyway).
The food is fine - I've only ordered food here once, but it was pretty good. My will power however is often stretched to the max around the popcorn after a few shots on Whiskey Makes you Frisky Fridays. This can be both good and bad depending on how much popcorn or maybe how much whiskey is involved...Either way, I will make a conscious effor to be regular here now.
I used to say AZ 88s martinis were served in a time warp. You would finish one, feel fan-freakin'-tastic and order another. By the time it arrived at your table, the effects of the first one had hit and you were wasted.
At Monkey Pants, I have to say "Let's do the time warp again." I ordered a small vodka tonic with the intent of having just one drink, doing a little writing, a taking in the Monkey Pants lifestyle. I felt fan-freakin'-tastic after one. Enough to say, "sure give me another." By the time it arrived.... Well, you know the story. Thankfully, I'd also ordered the grilled ham and cheese. Yummers, and very good with the VT.
I have been here a couple of times now and really dig this place. Â They have cold beer on tap and pretty nice staff. Â There are plenty of TV's for you to watch any sporting event. Â They have NTN trivia with lots of TV's. Â It's a very comfortable bar with pool tables, couches, booths and an outdoor patio/sidewalk.
I would rate there food above average just for the fries. Â They are really good plain or with cheese. Â Their chicken sandwiches and burgers are very good and above what I usually expect from a bar.
I knew I was going to like Monkey Pants before I walked in the door when I saw the sign: "Today-free reacharounds for anyone wearing Suns gear." Sweet.
You will like Monkey Pants if:
*you want a multitude of TVs to watch various sporting events
*you appreciate friendly bartenders
*you want cheap drinks (my Stella drafts were $4.50 which isn't bad at all and my Bud Light draft was $2.50)
*you like bar games (pool, shuffleboard, and board games are all available to play)
*you like places with mixed crowds
*you don't want to dress up to go to a bar (I'm pretty sure I could have rolled up in a hoodie, jeans, and flip flops and still have been overdressed)
*you like obscure songs from the '80s (for some reason that dominated the jukebox selections last night)
*you want to chill on a couch with a drink in front of a faux fireplace
Overall, Monkey Pants is not a place that takes itself seriously. It has a loyal clientele from what I could tell as the bartender seemed to know a lot of the folks who wandered in. Â My husband and I will definitely be returning when we are in the mood for a few drinks, sports, and shuffleboard.
When I lived in Tempe I would grab a late night snack and a cocktail here on occasion.
This place is somewhere between a dive and a sports bar. it is large and has several different rooms to drink/eat in. I have seen bands perform here a few times late at night. The drinks are cheap and the food is decent.
The regulars and the bartenders were friendly.
You really cannot beat this place. Â A great out of the way bar that has no frills whatsoever, just a kick back atmosphere with some of the strangest dcor I've seen. Â The big screen in back always has the Yule log burning, the "leg lamp" from A Christmas Story is proudly displayed, and a framed Kiss posted is proudly displayed.
The rest of the place follows suit. Â The staff is quirky, always yells "HELLO" as you enter, and has no problem just chatting it up with you about whatever is on their minds. Â There is always free popcorn, and plenty of beers to chose from. Â My advice would be to stick with beers in the bottle. Â I've had some funky stomach issues after drinking beer on draft there.
The food here is surprisingly good. Â Grilled, meaty chicken wings smothered in BBQ sauce are tops on my list, and they have more burger options that you know what to do with. Â There are quite a lot of TVs to watch, a juke box that is always playing local favorites (when they don't have a band playing), and there are a couple of pool tables and a shuffle board table as well.
And if you happened to be there at 1:00am, you get to experience the "One O'clock Shirtless Shot." Â You never know whose shirt is coming off...
I'm just going to tell the story.
I had a friend who was having a birthday. The plan was to go to Pink Taco (yes, we are that childish that we wanted to drink at a place that is a euphemism for vagina) but for some reason, it fell through. Some how, Monkey Pants got brought up.
So, at 12 pm on a Friday afternoon a bunch of girls show up to Monkey Pants. It was dead. There were the regulars there seated at the bar, but other than that...no one. Except a bunch of giggling girls drinking Vodka Redbull, drunk dialing, and doing shots. Right. So someone spies a flyer that said something about a 2 o'clock shirtless shot. We inquire about this with the waitress and are informed that the shirtless shot means if you take your shirt off, show the titties, you get a shot at 2 AM. Being as it was 2 PM, the waitress obliged and we did shots half naked in the afternoon.
Everybody loves the day drinking.
But honestly, I'd love to come back at night. The staff is friendly and the decor is awesome. Sure, it's divey but then again it is called Monkey Pants. What were you expecting?
(aka. SKETCHY TEMPE with BONNIE G, Part One of Three)
I was in Tempe. I was having coffee. I was sedate. I wanted to see if anyone wanted join me and discuss Kafka or something boring. And so I called up the town's most famous resident to see what was goin' down.
"Um, YOU need to see sketchy Tempe. It is time. And I will be the one who will show it to you. Meet me at Time Out Lounge. No, wait. Meet me at Monkey Pants. Yes, Monkey Pants!"
And so I did.
Monkey Pants! Sorry folks, but this name is nonsensically awesome. I walked in and sat myself at the round bar, joining a smattering of other patrons sitting there by themselves, each staring into nowhere in particular. Well drinks for $2.50, served in a standard kitchen glass. Nice! I proceeded to watch the football game and was soon joined by my Tempe tour guide.
We were approached by the bartender to do discounted Patron shots....but only if we wore sombreros. There was barely anyone here on a Sunday night, and I'm of the kind who doesn't care anyway, and the thought of me and Bonnie G sitting at a desolate stripmall bar with sombreros on is kind of ridiculous and great at the same time, but shots were not on my agenda for the night. Alas.
I then got a royal tour of the place, including the great leg lamp (actually it's two legs, not just one!), shuffleboard, pool tables, couches with a cozy fire being played on endless loop on a big screen TV, ample board games and another section with tables and chairs, which is where we sat, under the painting of the teddy bear in Richard Simmons gear.
Other patrons were seated all over the large space, so everyone had their own private area in a way. I actually really dug this. I'm not one who needs a place to be crowded to enjoy myself or feel like "it's happening." Sitting around a fake fire with pints and board games with a few friends is more my speed these days anyway. So I may sound decrepit, but I'm really not that old. I swear.
Sure, Monkey Pants has frat-party gimmicks throughout the day, but this place has no pretense whatsoever. How can you even take it seriously? Even it doesn't take itself seriously.
I mean, it's just sitting there. In a strip mall. In Tempe. With a painting of a teddy bear wearing Richard Simmons workout gear on the wall and a stack of sombreros sitting next to a popcorn machine. Waiting for you to leave your critical mind behind and enjoy the now.
And enjoy the now we did.
All thanks to my Sketchy Tempe tour guide.
4 stars.
(end of Part One)
I was skeptical, but when she asked me if I was coming on Thursday dressed as a pilgrim for free drinks -- that's when I decided I loved Monkey Pants.
Yes, the bartender girl also tried to interest me in a round of goldfish racing, shuffleboard, or some board games, I just about lost it. Â This place rocks. Â Monkey Pants takes "Campy" and "Kitschy" and magnifies those terms by 1,000. Â This place is not pretty in its strip mall glory, and would be considered a dive by most folks.
I was on sensory overload, taking in the fish tanks, bad decor, construction paper turkey/hand cut-outs, grandma couches and grandma lamps, the leg lamp from the Christmas Story, the video-feed fireplace looping in the corner -- all the while trying to envision myself in a pilgrim get-up. Â She wasn't kidding.
Some co-workers and I found ourselves here for their $3.95 hot wing night happy hour and had cheep drinks, plus a complimentary grape tootsie roll shot. Â Grand total? Â 9 bucks and change. Â Toothless grey haired Willy mocked us "Suits" folks as we left the place, but... Â I'm sooo there next week and I might even show my chest for a free shot at 1 am.
I like Monkey Pants. I just moved to Tempe and I don't know many people here or places to go yet. Monkey Pants is very close to my house, and I'll admit that the first time I went in it was because the silly name caught my attention.
This place is really laid back. The servers are friendly and the drinks are cheap. Â I like the shuffleboard table :-) . Â I have been here during the day and at night. It's not a bad place to watch football on a Sunday. They have a lot of TVs, and it's not hard to find a table in front of a TV and get the server to put on whichever game you want to watch.
My one complaint is that I have never seen this place crowded, even on weekend nights. Bring a bunch of friends that you want to hang out with, because there aren't many people to meet here.
I went here once. Â I couldn't resist. Â Who could resist? Â My friends would ask what I was up to all evening and I could say, "Oh, I spent the evening hanging out in Monkey Pants."
I've never been there for shirtless shots, but I appreciate any place that's willing to serve breakfast and beer at the same time. Â In some ways, the decor says, "Like me! I'm trying too hard." but it grew on me. Â Or maybe that's the liquor talking. Â Our cocktailer was nice. Â She flashed a genuine smile. Â Not a dead shark eyes, Stepford wife smile. Â I tip extra for real smiles.
I looked up to the TV screen expecting to see a bunch of grown men dressed up in costumes running around like super heros while fat old guys dressed like zebras keep score on who looks less ridiculous. Which is what usually appears on such screens.  It took me a few moments to remember how to focus my eyes and realize I was actually staring at an image of Leonard Nimoy from the sixties wearing a blue v-neck and  pointy ears.  Spock?
My god. Â I think I just creamed my monkey pants. Â I will definitely go there again.
I know I'm going to loose me some cool points for this one, but I feel no shame at all in shouting, "I LOVE MONKEY PANTS!"
Besides, if the Time Out Lounge crowd could even hear me at the other end of the parking lot, they'd probably just assume I was being snarky and ironic. I mean, who the hell frequents a bar named Monkey Pants? Do they have children in tow? Is there a petting zoo on the premises? Because it sounds like a Barney-Raffi-Teletubby-Wiggles sing-a-long title, not a place where adults go to get blotto.
Oh yeah? Well what's in a name? That which we call cheap fucking drinks by any other name would still get us loaded. And who are you to argue with Shakespeare? He hates your crappy emo poems anyway.
Huh. I guess I didn't know how strongly I felt about Monkey Pants until that verbal vomit just came spewing forth.
As a gesture of goodwill to those of you who I know I'll see at Time Out in the future, and will undoubtedly rib me for my irrational love of a place called Monkey Pants, I will concede the following point: it is most definitely not an evening drinking destination.
It is an excellent happy hour or weekend day drinking joint though. Discount 2.25 well and 1.75 domestic drafts between 5 and 7 (that only increase by a buck at regular prices)? Hell yes. An unlimited fount of free popcorn good for munching and launching? Check. An entire menu of good bar food if you're looking to absorb some of the alcohol sloshing around? You betcha. One of the best waitresses/bartenders I have ever had the pleasure of tipping? Thanks for consistently getting me drunk, Krista!
There's pool, shuffle board, trivia cards, board games, kitschy paintings, a fake fireplace playing on loop, leg lamps, and enough televisions to send you into a pop culture coma with their soft, hypnotizing glow. This is the type of place where I can show up at five and drink straight through to ten or later without even knowing it, and thankfully, without even coming close to breaking the bank.
I've been around for the "wacky" antics that others have brought up as negative (one o'clock shirtless shots, fish races, and thematic discounts--moustache Monday and wig Wednesday, and so on) but hardly anyone participates. And I've never been to Monkey Pants when it's exuded a "frat bar atmosphere." Come during happy hour and you're more likely to see the local flavor propped up around the island bar (I dig an island bar) than the kind of people barhopping down the Mill Avenue strip. There's just enough buffer room to keep them at bay.
So if you're comfortable enough to put aside pretension and indulge in a little kitsch, I'm sure I'll be seeing you soon!
And if that doesn't convince you, maybe these six little words will:
Bacon. Wrapped. Deep. Fried. Hot. Dog.
A nacho cheese covered coronary on a bun. I never knew death could taste so delicious.
Confession Number One: It is all Erica's fault. She invited me over here after work one day and I said, "You mean Time Out Lounge, right? Are you joking Monkey Pants? Normally that is said like a punch line...right?" She giggled. "They take cards-TOL is cash only. And its fucking cheap." Well. Cheap drinks get me every time. Sure, I 'll try Monkey (snicker) Pants.
As I pulled up, I kept looking around, maybe worried all the hipsters from TOL or Yucca would stand in shock and point down the strip mall "Yo! You in the 'ironic' Genesis shirt and cat eye glasses-didn't you mean to get some shitty beer and download some Pixies on THIS side of the strip mall?!?" And I would have to say..."Yes. I wasn't gonna go to a fucking place called MONKEY PANTS-plfft- C'MON!"
But...Confession 2: I love Monkey Pants. Dude, they take CARDS. Their happy hour is incredibly HAPPY. Buck fifty wells in a PINT glass, heavy handed? Cheap huge basket of fries? Reasonably priced beer ANYWAY? Trivia cards strewn about? Terrifying teddy bear wearing 80s workout clothes, taunting me to be a winner on their wall? More TVs than "Videodrome" or a bad 80s performance art piece (or Remote Control's Champion Room-yeah, MTV reference)? And just when you think you can't triple fist cheap G&Ts any longer...8pm rolls around and its SPECIALS time! Yippie!
Confession 3: I have been here more times than Time Out Lounge...during the day. TOL is for late at night. MP is for when you wanna get someone drunk you don't want your friends to know about and do them fast...and hit the hot hipsters for sloppy scenester seconds after midnight, ya know? Listen, I'm poor. And 15 bucks for being so trashed I had to call up a friend to help me to their house ONE BLOCK AWAY (twice) for over three hours of fun. Shit.
Yeah, the decor is kinda weird, a little Ground Roundish, I love the Legs Lamp, the bathroom is in the weirdest place ever, and you won't find your dream lover in front of the acoustic set they have. But Nate at the bar will take care of you (and your broken dreams), the regulars are ridiculous and your smoker friends can chill on the front patio and bring their drinks with 'em. Plus they have all this popcorn and you can throw at your friends near the shuffle board.
So Monkey Pants completes my Shitty Trifecta of Yucca, Time Out and Monkey-a Bermuda Triangle of Sleaze, if you will.
As a bar, Monkey Pants seems to want it both ways. Â They have a 1:00am shirtless shot routine that makes the place feel like an annoying college bar. Â At the same time, the atmosphere is decidedly low-key, especially considering the "wacky" and "outrageous" name. Â I've been there on a few Friday nights and, each time, could count on one hand the number of patrons. Â If nobody is going there, it must not just be me. Â Maybe it's better during lunchtime...
Time Out Lounge is in the same strip-mall. Â I'd recommend drinking there instead.
I really wanna come here when it's actually a bar. Â I mean, yea, every time I come here it's a bar. Â But I'd like to come for an actual bar activity. Â I think it could be cool. Â
But it's a great lunch spot. Â I really wish I didn't go to lunch alone because I'd love to make use of those board games. Â And it just seems sad to play with the shuffle board by myself. Â
Today when eating lunch, 4 TV's in front of me were set to Espn2, Nascar, The movie Saw, and Teletubbies. Â Well, first Barney ended - then it was Teletubbies. Â On one of the many TV's in the other room I saw they also have some cooking show on which I wish I'd been in front of while eating. Â Very theme appropriate.
I do love their full leg, fishnet lamp. Â And some of their cheesy signage is fun. Â But I'd love to hang out with friends in their little mini-living room on the raised platform with the big screen TV in the corner playing the "fireplace" video on constant loop. Â Love that thing.
But - I go for lunch. Â Their Philly is good, and their burgers are pretty decent for a bar. Â Nothing amazing, but ok. Â The place is nicer on the inside than I expected, but still felt very casual. Â They definitely get bonus points for the popcorn machine behind the bar. Â That plus those board games take this to a solid 4 star experience based on my lunch time experiences.
The 5 best restaurants in the 2015 Denver Restaurant Week
3,611 Views | Category: Denver
The complete list of 2015 Denver Restaurant Week businesses
1,972 Views | Category: Denver
The tourists' guide to Portillos: 5 must have dishes
3,318 Views | Category: Chicago
Pho = Pronounced "fuh" not "foe" for pho-king sake
2,915 Views | Category: Denver
Indulgery selected to exhibit at Collision Conference
2,987 Views | Category: Press Releases
Not Logged In
BUSINESSES
Local Businesses
Near Me
My Favorites
SOCIAL
Blog & News
MY ACCOUNT
Login
Register
Contact Us
Add Your Business
