Snooky's

This place is a total dump. They should just tear it down. I walked in on a Thursday evening and was disgusted by the whole thing. The place smelled like sweat and ass. I asked for a Coors light and was charged 4 dollars for it. Coors lIght is about .70 cents each at the supermarket. I know bars and clubs charge a lot for beer but cmon this place is worthless. A fat chick was dancing on stage so I tipped her 2 dollars more out of sympathy and not entertainment. I had to leave after about 15 minutes. I felt like I needed to take a shower just for being there.

Snooky's has been a part of Simi Valley history ever since I was a young boy. I remember hitting a few at the local batting cage with my little league team and getting so side tracked by the shady men and women who would enter the joint. I ended up being pegged by the pitching machine. Snooky's was that place of wonder and excitement that led to those "bad" thoughts all young men tend had.

My uncle would pick up women from there. My parents would fight when my dad came home from there.  My cousin got attested there... twice. In my teenage years I made a vow when I am a man I will drink at Snooky's!

Fast forward 10 years. I moved away from Simi. Lived in 3 different places. Dated a few girls and a couple women. And visited almost every exotic club, dive bar and lounge the valley, downtown and Hollywood had to offer. Snooky's was all but forgotten. But sometimes late at night my dreams would be haunted by that yellow neon sign and I would wake up wondering what went on behind those grimy brick walls?

Then one day I get a call from and old high school friend and he asks "What are you up to tonight? The old group wants to meet for drinks and it would be awesome if you came." Only if we go to Snookys I replied. After a long pause he agreed. That night we all met in the darkness behind the Jack in the Box. Parked our cars where there was no streetlights to be found and the 3 of us marched as men across to street toward that familiar neon sign. Walked straight up to the door held our breath and entered.

The darkness was like nothing I had ever seen before. I stood there totally blind waiting for my eyes to adjust. The bar was completely silent no music playing anywhere. Looking over I noticed an empty stage and a row of stools straight ahead. Besides for us and the bartender no one else occupied the place. John, Ray and I took our seats and ordered the drink of our fathers before us. Coors Light. Handing over a $20 I was give back seventeen dollars in singles. Half way though my beer. The bartender said everyone welcome Sheela to the stage and like magic the music kicked on.

A curtain opened up and what came through may make me want to weep for years to come. I don't want to be mean but when Raymond whispered into my ear, Dude, is she... pregnant?" I knew it was time to leave. Hastily finishing our beers we walked to the stage and left the change from the drinks on the dance floor. Headed outside and promised never to return again.

I remember when this place was called Snoopys. When I want to see some flesh and breathe in that sweet smell of dancer, but don't want to drive or pay a cover, this place is alright. Liked back in the day before it was Snookys "The Club". Was gritter then. Inside is nice. Drinks are weak and overpriced. I have seen some good looking girls here. Thing that bothers me,whether it happens here or other bikini / strip bars, I hate seeing the dancers hanging out with their boyfriends. Kills the buzz. I thought that wasnt allowed.Place has lost some of the necessary sleaze factor that makes this sort of place fun. Cheap pool tables are a plus. Kind of Simi Valley mark. This town being so conservative. Hope it lasts and improves.