My dad walks in first, carrying a bottle of wine in a bag, as we've done EVERYWHERE in this dry county without any problems (or issues getting glasses to drink the wine in).
Wrinkled old prune at the counter: "What is THAT???" (pointing at the wine.) Â You cain't bring that in here. Â This is a DRY COUNTY! Â NO LIQUOR ANYWHERE IN THE COUNTY!! Take that outside IMMEDIATELY!"
Ma'am, I have a surprise note here from Jesus.  It  reads as follows:
"Your 'place in heaven' is temporarily full, but they can put you on a waiting list. Â Right now the wait is approximately 1million years, but feel free to sit at the bar while......oh sorry...I guess you won't be dining with us after all."