Midtown Billiards

Oh Midtown how I do love the. This has to be in the top ten of dive bars in the USA! Always a great time here and I'm always meeting fun, new, and interesting people. This is as real as it gets because people come here to have a good time not to play dress up and dance to hip hop with your pants sagging to the ground. When they don't have a live band playing it always seems as though they have the perfect playlist of music going that everyone loves and they bring back your best memories such as REO Speedwagon, Joan Jett, Black Keys, Zeppelin and tons more.

Sometimes around 3am and when the grill is pumping out a dozen burgers at a time its like a feeding frenzy and may briefly remind you of a scene from Gremlins after people around you start eating them because they are so delicious.  People actually stop talking and are 100% focused on that burger like its a frigging eating contest till the last bite so needless to say the Burgers are the flagship of this establishment as well as the tall ice cold PBR's.

I also recommend you buy the annual membership for $8 so that you have no cover charge for the remainder of the year as you will like most others come back week after week.

My friend Tricia refers to this place as hell-mouth and she's not far off. The black gaping maw of Midtown welcomes you with a foul stench and questionable patrons. The bartenders cop an attitude, you've got to pay a cover because it's "a private club" and don't think you'll leave without a layer of grease on your clothes.

It's not ALL bad. They do have spam sandwiches which are surprisingly edible after 100 vodka waters. Also, because it's an after hours spot, dudes are drunk enough to be very open about their desire to take you home. It's happened both times I've been there. Flattering certainly.

Protip: Check their teeth to make sure they're not meth users.

Truly, truly, exceptionally dirty. Cover is about $5.  Pool tables, late night bands, open til 5-ish. BEST burger. Have often gone as a last stop just for the burger. There's also Spam, Ham & cheese, & egg sandwiches served from the grill.

Thursdays are bottle toss. You lose, you're the last one to miss throwing your empty bottle in a trash can 20 ft away after several turns, you buy all players a happy hour beer. Immediately following the game, they place the best ipod mix of all ipod mixes (it includes Sweet Caroline & Delta Dawn).

Watch your purse. Watch your back. It's pretty safe, but I wouldn't someone looking for a fight. Characters here can be shady late night. Bring your own toilet paper as required. Also, HAND SANITIZER. I can't stress that enough.