My friends Andy and Greg always used to drag me in here. Â They used to have dollar beers or something like that, and it was very cheap. Â There is not much interesting here except that it is probably exactly like it was when it was built in the late 60's or early 70's. Â In that way, it is like a historical relic. Â The jukebox was filled with the worst classic rock ever, like Tom Petty radio hits from the 1990's or the worst Pretenders songs. Â Also the clientele consists of hardcore alcoholics and suburban pretenders.
Review Source:The other reviews are depressing. Â I was picking up fish and chips next door and realized it has been 20+ years since I was there. Â At one time it was my favorite place. Â The bar had an amazing collection of wildlife art and a logos beer selection. Â In '86 it was sold, the art stripped from the walls and it went to .hell
Review Source:If Charles Bukowski were still alive, this would be his favorite bar.
If you want to sip a flirtini while listening to the latest single from last year's American Idol winner, keep going to the pretentious bistros from where your type traditionally breed. But if you want to drink beer and shoot pool on a cum stained pool table, free off all the clatter of doufus hipsters talking about their latest facebook escapades, this is your joint.
Sniff.......it's the charm of the place!
I've been to Patrick's on numerous occasions. Most recently another interesting Saturday evening spent at Patrick's on the Avenue. Greeted upon entering by your friendly bartender and offered a refreshment.
Mmmm, a cold Millers Lite in a can and a Coors Light in a bottle.
You sit upon rickety bar stools with ripped pleather seats while listening to a potpourri of heavy metal and pop hits played on the juke box.
Bring your pool cues for the inside and your smokes for the veranda.
It seems as though everytime we go, we are only going to stop in for one, but typically 3 1/2 hours later we are shuffled out the door upon closing time.
Ahh, another evening filled with friendly folks at Patrick's.
Oh and sometimes there are patrons there not wearing shoes and asking you to hula in his hoop for a free drink. Not that you need to be told, but don't do it.
I agree with everything that Andy P said.
This place rocks. Â Come with cash, get some MGD *Light* in a can and have a good ole time.
The best part? Â So hard to decide.
Was it the Tru TV playing caught on tape video's of people getting the shit beat out of them in places that look *remarkably like the interior of Patrick's*? Â Maybe.
Was it the drunk dude who came over to our table and danced and offered to buy us all drinks because we are all "so good looking". Â
(who walks up to a table of 3 women and one dude and starts chatting? Â Oh, right, drunk truck drivers missing fingers).
The ladies gave all fake names, including Bianca (nice Em), Phoebe (spelled, we decided, Feebie) and Lizz.
I was about to tell him my name, but his phone rang (can you say cock blocked by the iphone?!) and he stumbled away.
All in all, spectacular. Â
It's kinda like the VFW in Mpls, but without all the hipsters and the singing.
See you there!
Would you like to score some Meth?
Hmm, how about maybe catching an STD from the barstool?
Or for something different, have a nursing home escapee sporting suspenders, high tops, v-neck tshirt, and pleated front khakis plug the jukebox, and try to steal your women?
Oh, how about being able to pay with cash only, but there is no ATM in the bar, and the only place with an ATM is the SuperAmerica up the street that has an ATM inside but they close at 11pm?
Yeah, ok, This is your place!!!!!!!!!!!11
I don't even know where to start.
Perhaps we should start in 1974, when the last person who ever gave a shit about this place, and could do anything about it left and did not come back...
First the setting:
Dark, dingy, depressing and greasy. There are windows across the front, but they are deeply tinted to keep you from being seen by the local constabulary/freinds/strangers/random passerby.
Trust me, when you leave this place, you are a suspect. Thankfully I was on foot the one (and only) time I have been here. Don't let the "stained glass" on the outside of the place fool you either, it's simply a lightbox, like a gas station sign.
The booths are torn, greasy pleather with grotty duct-tape in random patterns, and the light fixtures that hang down look like someone took a drill to a thermos, and installed a 80w bulb and some Jolly Ranchers. There are a few beer neon signs, and old florescent bulbs.
The floor had the carpet ripped up about 10 years ago, and then they gave up. Â Why do I think they gave up?
Perhaps it's the carpet adhesive that still bumpily stains the floor, or maybe it's the chunks of red carpet that still adorn the tough to get to (yet random) corners of the place.
Or MAYBE it's the bar that portions of are made out of plywood. Hmm, perhaps that's it.
The lone beer on tap was Michelob Amber Bock. They had all the other canned tripe in full supply though!
There is a pool table, but the surface if it looks like the part of the moon that has a mountain, and is eternally cooked by the blazing hot sun.
The house pool ques are as crooked as a Chicago senator, and I wanted to dip my hands in boiling bleach after handily beating my friend at pool.
The 2 other clients were also interesting...the lone patron at the bar was wearing a track suit, and picking meth scabs of his face and setting them on his napkin, and the other guy was trying to seduce my blonde female friend with polka moves to Led Zeppelin or something.
It was a bizzare experience. Â I live about 10 blocks from the place, and I'm never going back. The only thing that could improve the place is a fire followed by a bulldozer.
The bartender was a friendly type though, so that's good. I told him to get out while he still could.
Oh, and there is a 10'x20' patio out front for you smokers, but you run the risk of being seen by people, and then being excluded from polite society forever.
Don't go here.
It's for sale too. I wish I had the money so I could buy it, and burn it down.
If you do go, make sure you get a full de-lousing after, and stay away from pregnant friends, as the residue it leaves on you is bad for babies.
The 5 best restaurants in the 2015 Denver Restaurant Week
3,611 Views | Category: Denver
The complete list of 2015 Denver Restaurant Week businesses
1,972 Views | Category: Denver
The tourists' guide to Portillos: 5 must have dishes
3,318 Views | Category: Chicago
Pho = Pronounced "fuh" not "foe" for pho-king sake
2,915 Views | Category: Denver
Indulgery selected to exhibit at Collision Conference
2,987 Views | Category: Press Releases
Not Logged In
BUSINESSES
Local Businesses
Near Me
My Favorites
SOCIAL
Blog & News
MY ACCOUNT
Login
Register
Contact Us
Add Your Business
