The drinks and the ambiance are all you need, but the food isn't that bad, either. I am a huge fan, it's the only real tiki bar in Hawaii. All done up with the original vintage decorations, complete with blowfish and shell lamps. It's close to the airport and the view of the marina is great! I have been here many times and every time I am happy I went. The location isn't extremely convenient, and the parking is limited, but it is always worth the trip. Order the Zombie and sit in the grotto :)
Review Source:Hasn't changed in 20 years! Â I haven't been here for probably five years and was kinda happy that it remains the same. Â Like those old fuzzy slippers you take out on chilly mornings....don't want the neighbors to see you but it is a comforting experience. Â Had the chance to take a mainland customer here for lunch and thought he would enjoy this place....I was right.
I had the same Reuben Sandwich I have every time I come here and my guest had the Fish & Chips. Â He was blown away by the fish, Mahi Mahi, apparently it was as good as it looked. Â My Reuben was lightly grilled rye loaded with thick sliced corned beef, well rinsed sauerkraut and oozing with Russian dressing. Â Complete with onion rings and iced tea it was yummo! Â I was taken aback at the $3 tea....pricey for plain old tea.
The restaurant is in the dusty industrial section of Sand Island on a side road that hasn't been repaved in 50 years and while there is a small parking lot it is easier to park on the side of the road. Â If you time your exit from your car to the passing of the cars you can arrive in the restaurant sans dust. Â There is no AC so beware they don't seat you in the back.
Worth a try, they have Hawaiian music on weekends and a great pupu menu and its on the water at Keehi Lagoon.
I loved this place. Â Totally chill and relaxing right next to the marina. Â The staff was very friendly and nice. Â I loved the atmosphere and the kitchy old school tiki bar look and feel. Â I hope they don't have any intentions of remodeling this place anytime soon. Â Me and my friends will definitely be returning again and again. Â Warning about their Zombie drink...it bites! Â The 151 float can sneak up on you pretty quickly.
Review Source:Super friendly, chill with warranted kitch.
More of a locals spot, finding the place in the industrial area on the dirt road is part of the fun. Limited parking lot but street parking available. Instead of getting a tank top from the mall - stop here and support La Mariana. They will gladly open up their gift shop and give you some aloha spirit at this establishment. - complete with Tiki themes products - I wish they had a bigger selection!
The place has such a cool history, and you can read all about it on their menus and placards. It is fun and relaxing to sit by the boats in the open air. The mai tai's were great, and I got a free Kona class with my beer. Just north of HNL airport - great place to stop on your way on our off the island.
I came here for lunch with my sister, parents and partner and the service was mellow. Food is bar food - nothing special and you may have to deal with some flies, but it's worth it for the ambience. I'd love to come back in the evenings with the live music.
great view, great bar food, great drinks, great service, great hawaiian vibe, but expensive!! Â Had their appetizers including the calamari which are huge pieces of squid and incredibly tasty. Also had the double burger which was fantastic as well. Â top that off with a mai tai and margarita and it was a great way to end my short trip to hawaii
Review Source:No trip to Oahu is complete until we've made a visit to La Mariana. La Mariana is the last of the classic tiki restaurants. Think old school: nets, fishing balls, carved masks, tikis and lots of cool lighting. Anthony Bourdain even featured this place in an episode of No Reservations. We always seem to order the same thing...fish and chips and a mai tai. I don't know as the food is extraordinary, but the atmosphere knocks the ball out of the park. We've been coming for years, and I hope they stay in business for many years to come. This place is a hidden gem well worth the effort.
p.s. Typo on the menu offered a "Poo Boy Sandwich" LOL
Hidden on Sand Island Access Road is La Mariana Restaurant & Bar - the original Tiki Bar. Â Where the road turns to the left, you should turn to the right and you'll see it back there. Seek and you shall find.
It was built on the waterfront next to La Mariana Sailing Club before the area became industrial. Â This is supposed to be the oldest Tiki Bar in the world. Now it's pretty much the last one. Â Though it's been here a long time, there are issues that the lease may not be renewed at the next ending point. Check out this historic place in case it is soon too late.
It's a nice place for lunch or dinner and not too pricey. There is a neat waterfall inside the dining area. Since it's just east across the bay from the airport, it's a good place to relax before your flight. Watch the planes take off and contemplate your existance before flying back to reality.
Mahalos yeah fo' checkin' out dis place.
Been wanting to try this place for the awhile, since I am in constant search of "the perfect Mai Tai." Â La Mariana comes up a lot when people speak of Mai Tai's; turns out thats for good reason. Â Their Mai Tai is quite good and fresh. Â I am not certain but, I don't think they use any pre-made juices or mixes. Â It tasted good, not to sweet and just the right amount of alcohol to taste. Â I think if I had ordered two Mai tais in the 2 hours I was there I might have had a hard time driving home.
That is the only real problem with this place, the location. Â It's not near anything, except primo popcorn (which is worth the trip to sand island). Â We had a great marina side seating and the interior was very unique. Â I really felt like I was in "old Hawaii." Â I definitely suggest walking around the restaurant, so much tiki detail.
I will definitely go back, but not often solely for the location. Â I will bring out of town guests here mid day, in hopes of not hitting traffic when done. Â The prices were good $3 for a beer ($2.60 during happy hour) and $7 for a very good Mai Tai. Â
We did order a few appetizer which were okay. Â I would highly recommend, if you go here order the Mai Tai and the mushrooms.
I have been here twice and both times the service was terrible. Â The place is cute and I love the decor but the food is not for me. Â Neither my husband and I were satisfied for the price we paid. Â Well, the first time I went there I did love my pasta but the second time I got it, it was gross. Â We might go there again just to enjoy a bottle of wine and hang out.
Review Source:As a fan of all things tiki, we had to check out La Mariana. Admittedly, it's more about the ambiance than the food, but it was a great experience and I would go back. Mai Tai was good. My husband loved his seafood in eggplant dish, which was highly unusual and somehow worked. I only wish we hadn't waited 30+ minutes for our check.
Review Source:Really kitsch tiki bar, that boarders on a dive bar. Â The zombie mai tai was pretty decent but that is about all I enjoyed. Â The service was slow and awkward and the lighting was just to dim. Â Given the run down decor the lighting just made the place seem more run down that it probably was.
I wasn't about to try the food after looking at the mediocore menu and considering everything else.
There are places that exist to hold memories. Â This is one of those places. Â
The food was not great, but I was not there for the food. Â The service was slow, but that simply gave us more time to sit together and enjoy the moment. Â It was time to say goodbye.
La Mariana is the perfect place to take someone on the way to the airport. Â They will leave with the sweet memory of a place frozen in time. Â They will remember the view of the harbor, the clink of the ice in your glasses, and the Hawaii that is sold on postcards and in travel posters. Â They will look back on the photos you take as you sit and remember the simple, laid back Hawaii, not the hustle bustle of traffic and too-crowded beaches. Â
This works best if your visitor has an evening flight. Â The sunset view here is not spectacular, but is better than in many other places, and I've been able to snag a prime table for viewing every time I've visited. Â
So bring a visitor, order a drink and a deep fried appetizer, and forgive La Mariana for not following us into the present. Â This place holds too many memories to make the leap. Â Let it sit where it is, and step back in time for a bit. Â Your guest will be gone far too quickly, and you will be grateful for the ability to relive their time at your side.
food's decent, service is good.
I had the seafood sampler trio (I think that's what it was called), and the seafood trio. Tasted fresh, but it took kind of long. Drinks were good though! I liked the atmosphere a lot. This location was kind of hard to find lol.. but it is pretty romantic :)
Wow. Â A lot of four or five-star reviews riding on the "vibe" here. Â
Here's the cold and honest truth: this is a dive bar for old people. Â It's mediocre and unpretentious and non-threatening. Â It will not disturb your comfortable pensioner lifestyle. Â The service is slower than molasses, but you will not be burdened with strange Asian spices or fancy designer drinks. Â You will be treated to deep fried appetizers and lukewarm versions of the "standards"-- except that when I came, they were out of ahi and vegetables. Â (Yes. Â Vegetables.)
Maybe that was the "old Hawaii"... but if so, I can leave it buried. Â Being "authentic" isn't an excuse for crappy food, and I don't know why so many people are prepared to forgive it... why? Â Because there are some dusty blowfish lamps? Â Sorry, La Mariana.
I may have only stopped in for drinks, but La Mariana is an experience unto itself. From the so-retro-its-cool tiki bar complete with flaming drinks and that tiki mug, the warm glow from all the florescent lights, to the junkyard dog that tried to attack my car as I turned down the wrong street as I was leaving, the place hasn't changed in thirty years, and it's difficult not to have a good time.
Review Source:Came here for the 1st time as I was invited to a party as a guest.
When I arrived I totally could appreciate the ambiance - a nice Tiki bar with a great vibe. Â Also, with the ocean right next door, saw potential for sunsets to enjoy great drinks and a meal.
However, due to the VOG it was hot and muggy. Â This place doesn't have air-conditioning so it was very unpleasant. Â During the meal I was uncomfortable and noticed other people fanning themselves as well as could see some "sweat balls" develop on their foreheads.
The food was okay - it wasn't the best nor horrible. Â For food a 3-star, ambiance 4-star but due to the lack of air-conditioning, it was uncomfortable so I had to dock a point.
I always enjoy this place but this time what a horrid experience with a local resident in trying to park my car. In short we just left. The downfall of La Marina is their parking is horrible. There just is not enough to support their business.
The negative is parking. We arrived at noon, and no parking outside along the road. We pulled into the parking lot right next to La Mariana. I noticed a sign that said private parking only. Although the parking lot was right next to La Mariana I decided I should ask since the various signs said you would be towed and the signs did not mention who owned the parking lot. I got out and ask 2 ladies who were sitting in their car. The younger lady was nice and said she believed it was. BUT! The elderly lady in her car raised a fuss. She said it was for residents and I needed to move out of the parking lot and get out on the street with my vehicle. I immediately began to apologize stating that is why I asked. I did not want to park illegally are piss off people who rated to park there. BUT! She just kept going on and on my gosh even as I walked away to move she kept complaining I needed to park outside thier lot.
In short for once I was so frustrated I just left La Mariana. It use to be my #1 but this parking situation has now really turned me off.
It was predicted to be a cold day in Hell if I got to meet Yelp Honolulu's Val Y. Though actually it turned out to be a delightfully warm afternoon on O`ahu. Our lunch at La Mariana Sailing Club was my idea. I'd read this place exuded the ambiance of old-style Waikiki. Though actually it's 7 miles Ewa bound from modern Waikiki above Sand Island.
My Zombie was so exceedingly strong I craved brains after 3 sips. Fun! My Hawai`ian Cajun Spiced Mahi Mahi was quite tasty and seriously spicy. Lacking were half my side of rice's crunchy undercooked grains and my tougher than firm broccoli. Service initially gruff, but morphed to more welcoming. What I enjoyed most was the venue's enormously engaging, over-the-top late '50's tiki chic décor amid a mellow open atmosphere allowing cool breezes off Ke`ehi Lagoon to permeate.
I've no tight emotional ties to La Mariana, yet appreciated it's honest 55 year hold on days gone by. I'm glad I visited to satiate my curiosity, but I've no overwhelming reason to return. Can't deny it was fun relaxing, laughing, drinking, and sharing intimate conversation here with Val in the old-style way. Though actually it was in the late '50's bona fide tiki bar way.
3.5 stars overall
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We have amazing Tiki bars in the SF Bay Area, and my BF is a huge fan of them. One of the best was just a block from our home in Alameda, so when we found out there is one here, we've been dying to check it out. So...our review & comparatives:
The decor was really cool. The service was decent. The entertainment was super cool. The drinks were awful. We didn't try the food.
Decor is totally Tiki Bar fashion, complete with the straw ceilings, nets, ocean decor & colored balls. And as always, once I step into a Tiki Bar, I get sleepy.
Service at the bar started off good, but either bar tender forgot our drinks or the waitress did on one of the rounds. That was the only ding, the rest of the rounds were good.
Entertainment is the best. They have a blind guy who plays piano, and on some nights you can sing along with him! Throw anything at him and he'll play it! I wanted him to sing Ray Charles I Got a Woman but my bf scolded me :(
The drinks were nothing...blah...no comparison to the Tiki Bars back home...and did you know the Mai Tai was invented in Emeryville by Trader Vic's? Yeah...it was not so good. I was excited to order the Scorpion...but they didn't have that. Navy Grog is a staple to any Tiki Bar and it was not on the menu, nor did the bartender know how to make. The drinks were too sweet, too strong, or flat.
We will try to come back on Thursday night for their Jazz night and will continue my review.
Kit H. (Reisterstown, MD) - "Braddah Val! Â Wife and I will be in Honolulu to celebrate our anniversary in November. Â Let's get together! Â How about lunching with us at the La Mariana Sailing Club?"
The La Mariana Sailing Club! Â I haven't been there in years! Â The mention of the name brings back memories and I reminisce a bit of days gone by.
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Located in an industrial area on the southern shores of Sand Island, the restaurant was founded in 1957 by Annete and Johnny Campbell.
I has survived all these years and resisted major upgrades and change. Â For me the restaurant takes me back in time and I remember a Hawaii of years ago ...
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I pick Kit and his wife up in Waikiki. Â I don't drive through Waikiki that often. Â Oh how this place as changed. Â As I drive through Waikiki I get flashbacks of a less crowded Waikiki.
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Me: Â "Hey Kit! Â There it is! Â The La Mariana Sailing Club Restaurant Bar." Â
Kit: Â "Cool!"
<a href="http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/IbnAb0r2HxVzIFOFXzSfLw?select=v-f-IO4WSk4kN4Xvo78O9Q#bDBnhnTDMWnpc4h4eZZD3Q">http://www.yelp.com/biz_…</a>
For those that didn't know; the La Mariana Sailing Club Restaurant and Bar is one of the last Tiki Bar/Restaurants still in operation on Oahu.
The food is nothing special at La Mariana and the service is just average on a good day. Â But it ain't no big thing braddah!
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And guess what? Â They still serve .....
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Kit had a Zombie and his wife Ariel had a Mai Tai.
The restaurant is all about the past and is very nostalgic. Â You walk in, look around and you sit. Â The place and atmosphere takes you back to the time of time Bing Crosby, Elvis, Don Ho, Kalapana.
Where else will you see shell lamps.
<a href="http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/IbnAb0r2HxVzIFOFXzSfLw?select=hqfAS83MvMA35QFPqfUb8w#hqfAS83MvMA35QFPqfUb8w">http://www.yelp.com/biz_…</a>
Another flashback for me.
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Sitting in the restaurant eating I picture Kit with his lei of an Alii; Ariel with a fragrant pikake lei of a Queen and Elvis singing the Hawaiian Wedding song to honor them and their wedding anniversary.
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They are a beautiful couple.
Kit and his wife love Honolulu. Â Hawaii is a place of fond memories for them. Â They love the weather and the people here. Â Their attraction to the islands go back decade. Â They have images of Hawaiian surfers riding waves off of Waikiki; luaus and hula girls dancing; coconut trees swaying; aloha shirts and muumuus; tiki bars and the TV classic Hawaii 5-0 embedded and fresh in their minds.
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You might say that for them; they chase the Hawaiian rainbow. Â La Mariana is a place at the end of a Hawaiian rainbow.
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The La Mariana takes you back in time. Â It is not chic or classy. Â But it has a character that you cannot help but love. Â The place is like a time machine that takes you to the Hawaii of the 60's and 70's. Â The place is soothing like Hawaiian music of the 70's. Â You just naturally enjoy this trip back in time!
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I really enjoy our lunch at La Mariana.
Change and progress are inevitable. Â The restaurant may not survive another decade. Â I am thankful. Â I will remember my lunch with my Braddah Kit and Ariel. Â I will remember you.
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Oh and one more thing.
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We didn't come here for the food..
When you find a place that has a similar name to yours-one just has to go for laughs... Little did we know it was going to be a zombie filled night  haha
Place was very sea-side cozy and quiet- we were there at sunset. We ordered two zombies a piece ( my fiance, myself, and a friend) and sampled some of the appetizers-sadly don't remember the names.. Â The drinks were amazing, and our waitress was great-such a sport to take a picture with me.
At the moment, I am a fan... for the sake of zombies and great cocktails... I will be going back for a second review based on food.
La Mariana was one of my first stops in Hawaii when I first came here to visit July 2012. This location offers such a nice view while your enjoying your cocktail and hanging with friends. They do have a TV at the bar where you may enjoy a show or sporting event as well when kicking back and relaxing.
There is also a tiki mug/t-shirt/gift store right next to the restaurant which I believe sell one of the nicest mugs and shirts and is well known on the main land to those who collect this line of items.
prices for the cocktails were about average when it came to the drinks. you will be looking at paying about $7+ for a single drink, which isn't to bad especially when your enjoying the view that they offer. seating won't be a problem cause they have plenty of room here to seat you are your friends or family.
kick back and relax, enjoy the great weather, and enjoy a great cocktail here.
Go for the experience and the vibe, not the food so much. Â I had poke, which was great tasting, but the ahi was a little stringy. Â My parents had sandwiches, which were "fine", but the fries tasted fishy.
Decent service, cool place. Â I was glad to check it out (we stopped on the way to taking my parents to the airport) but wouldn't get too excited about the food. Maybe just a Mai Tai next time (which we didn't try on this go-around).
Welcome to an old-school Tiki Bar. Â Located in an Industrial park mere minutes from the airport this is a great place to wait for guests to arrive or send them off with a bite to eat in a relaxed atmosphere before they depart beautiful O'ahu...
Expect to wait at least a half hour for your food, so PLAN AHEAD...
Our server was wonderful! Â (Her name escapes me tight now, but I will update when I remember.... Â *Warning: Â don't start holding your breath, my mind works in mysterious ways!!)
Food was bar food, cocktails LOOKED magnificent!
French Dip is made with thick slices of the house Prime Rib. Â
Nachos = Huge Portion! Â (perfect & satisfying for our two boys to split!) Â
Mahi-Mahi sandwiches were good, not great; but the Cocktail Sauce & Coleslaw were fantastic!!
**Fried Shrimp Dinner - 6 large butterflied shrimp, cooked til crisp, served with mashed potatoes! Â Our niece was the happiest diner at our table!! Â
Looking forward to trying LA MARIANA's Happy Hour....
My friends and I frequent this place about once every month or two. Sometimes we go a little less often, but whenever we do, the result is always the same: Beautiful sunset, delicious drinks, wonderful pupus (if a bit pricey), and all-around a great time.
I am a HUGE fan of the Zombie (which, for some reason, I have been calling "Zombie Mind Erasers" for over a year). The bartenders are not shy with the alcohol. If you drink any of the cocktails, pace yourself. If you're driving, either have one and done, or just forget about it.
The live entertainment is a guy on a piano. He plays well, not too loud, interactive with the crowd for requests, and friendly. Basically the opposite of an obnoxious piano man.
As you may have heard elsewhere, this is indeed the last of a dying breed: A genuine tiki bar.
My friends took my partner and I here for our going away dinner before getting on a plane to the mainland. How had we not tried this place before!? The atmosphere and crowd was hilarious, talk about people watching. Some adorable old lady in a mumu got up to sing "How much is that doggy in the window?" When she started barking, I nearly peed myself! Hilarious. The food is kinda bizarre, menu items that seemed popular decades ago. Mozzarella sticks, prime rib, lobster tail, things like that. The menu reminded me of something you would see at a "fancy" old glof club house in the midwest. The drinks... oh man watch out. One zombie, and I was already feeling great!
Check it out, this is a hidden gem in the industrial harbor area. You will not be disappointed with the tiki kitsch. I wish I had video of that lady barking...
We went here for my future father in-law's birthday, because we had heard that the place was a legendary Honolulu spot.
It wasn't terrible from the start, but my beer was a little less than cold and the booth was far from comfortable and was slightly slanted. The cushions on the booth across from us were torn.
The appetizers came and the chips in the nachos were some of the stalest I have ever eaten.
Then, I viewed not one, but two rats, coming out of the waterfall/fountain area and one scampered across the top of the awning over the booths across from us. I know it's in a industrial part of town and right on the water, but rodents freely running around a restaurant is unacceptable. When we left, I told the waitress and she sorta shrugged it off and was far from shocked.
I'm thinking about contacting the Hawaii department of health tomorrow.
If I could give this place zero stars I would...The experience was horrific! Â
I took my husband here on our honeymoon (June 2012) because he is a fan of tiki bars and I read about La Mariana in a magazine article that made it sound like an authentic tiki bar and a great touristy spot. Â It was AUTHENTIC all right! Â As in, I don't think they have cleaned the place since it opened! Â The bathroom was DISGUSTING with bugs and an actual lizard sitting on the inside of the window sill...And while we sat at our booth we sighted a RAT scampering the rafters, eeeeeeeeeeeeew!!! Â I wanted to throw up! Â And that was BEFORE the food came, we seriously considered walking out after seeing the rat, but decided to stick it out (in retrospect a poor choice). Â
The food was ATROCIOUS. Â I ordered the mac nut crusted mahi mahi and it was soggy and fishy...GROSS!!! Â My husband played it "safe" and ordered a burger...He said it tasted like a frozen costco patty but worse! Â They did give us a complimentary slice of cheesecake for our honeymoon...BUT, it seriously tasted like it had been in the freezer for years...I guess on that one "it's the thought that counts." Â Â
The service was also pretty bad...we made a reservation ahead of time and even mentioned we were honeymooning...They initially sat us right next to the front door, not what we had in mind. Â The service was SLOW and we were forced to tip 20% regardless. Â The drinks were OK but nothing to be excited about.
One last thought, if for whatever reason you do decide to go to this place...You must drive yourself there or take a cab to the front door...My hubby and I decided to be adventurous and take the city bus and the closest stop was a half mile or so away...we walked through a sketchy industrial neighborhood at dusk and as we got near the restaurant a nice lady in a car actually pulled over to us and warned us that we should take a cab home (we had already planned to do so) because the area is not a good place to be at night....Yikes.
I have lived here all my life and have never been here before. So when I was asked to dinner, I had to Yelp it to find out where it is.
If I was driving, I would have missed the turn. Luckily I wasn't... After passing the old Kilgo's, there's a chain-linked fence with a unnoticeable sign that has "La Mariana Sailing Club"... Don't blink! You'll miss it.
Parking is outside along the fence. There is no mark stalls, so be courteous when parking.
I was told that this is the last standing original tiki bar. Honestly, I don't know exact what defines a "tiki bar". But the decor is old touristy Hawaiian like from the 60's when Elvis Presley used to preform in Hawaii. The place opens up to face to docks, so if you go for early dinner, you get to catch the sunset.
Service was friendly. Our server, Cherry was helpful with my questions. The menu is half made up of drinks and the food list isn't a whole lot, but enough. There was a handsome list of pupu's; aka appetizers, but we didn't order any. There were a good portion of seafood, but none that is fresh. Maybe freshly previously frozen..? I settled for the Mac-nut mahi mahi ($20) and so did my friend. It was not bad. The broccoli was fresh and it tasted good. The rice was a bit hard, but I don't eat rice. Another friend ordered the Hawaiian Cajun Chicken, it was served over pasta. She seemed to have enjoyed it. Her husband order a double cheese burger.. that's two hamburger patties on a whole wheat bun. Ordered with out any veggies, add bacon and bbq sauce. He enjoyed it.
There was live music on the other end of the restaurant. One of the piano and another on the ukulele. Cute Hawaiiana tiki themed songs.
It is a cute hideaway.
I can't think of two people more polar opposites than Anthony Bourdain and Rachael Ray. Â Yet they both love this place. Â Although I think Bourdain would be more apt to stab Rachael with a cocktail fork in her overly cheery skull than share this place with her, La Mariana is a place worth checking out.
Let's be up-front and real here. Â The food is not that great.
I come here at least once every two weeks or so. Â I have to entertain guests from the mainland US or from Asia coming here to do business. Â And they like the idea of going to the last authentic tiki bar in Hawaii. Â The kitsch you see around you here, it's not fake. Â It's the real 1950's - 1960's deal. Â It's the last place, the only survivor. Â In fact, when the famous tiki bars of history closed down, it was La Mariana who bought up their decor and furniture to add to their own. Â That seat you're sitting on? Â From Don the Beachcomber's. Â For all you know, Elvis himself may have eaten off of that table you're sitting on. Â It's a place frozen in time, on the edge of the water, where the modern world fades away and you're in a place where things are good.
What makes it good are the Zombies. Â Except for taking 151 shots straight, having a Zombie or three sitting at a table overlooking the lagoon is one of my favorite ways to spend a Friday night. Â The Zombie is a very strong Mai Tai, I suspect made with the aforementioned 151. Â And I love it. Â If you're looking for sophisticated, go somewhere else like Nobu's or Lewer's. Â Zombies are for getting sloshed old-school Tiki style.
Here's what you need to know about La Mariana:
Parking: Â First you have to get here. Â It's hidden away, like a forgotten treasure, along a dirt road off of Sand Island Access Road, along the lagoon. Â When you're driving down Sand Island Acces Road, once you pass Auiki street, look to the right. Â There's a large building, and then a small dirt road with a sign that says "La Mariana" on it. Â Take a right onto that road, and drive along the dirt road until you reach the restaurant at the bend in the road. Â You can park in their small parking lot, or you can park along the edge of the dirt road by the restaurant. Â Walk toward the water from either direction and you'll end up at the hostess station.
Food: Â The Food is alright. Â Let me put it this way -- every dish is done better elsewhere. Â But you're not here for the food. Â You're here to descend back into a 1960's tiki bar and get sloshed on Zombies. Â At lunch, the Mahi sandwiches are good, as is the Reuben. Â At dinner, pretty much everything is decent but not stellar.
Ordering: Â Your host will seat you. Â You order off of a menu. Â The kitchen can be slow at times, especially at lunch rush hour; so don't expect a quick lunch. Â I've had to wait over 30 minutes for my lunch before. Â Dinner seems faster, but not well paced.
Seating: Â Lots of seats all over the restaurant, mostly tables of four; with booths in the back area. Â Probably can seat 100 or so.
Decor: Â Straight-up Tiki madness from the 1960's. Â Authentic too.
Cost: Â About $10 to $13 for lunch entrees; about $15 to $23 for dinner entrees. Â Zombies are $7 I think.
Sophisticated, La Mariana is not. Â Food is not great. Â Drinks are unsophisticated and oldschool, strong and unapologetic. Â But there's something unquantifiable about this place that's just cool in a way that places aren't anymore, without trying; they are true retro, and a nice way to spend a Friday evening forgetting about the terrible things of this modern world.
4/5.
I've been to La Mariana a few times. The food is ok, but the ambience is a home run.
Right on the docs you can smell the ocean. There are pufferfish that have been puffed, hollowed out, and turned into lights. This is the kind of place where druken salors would fight in a movie. It's fun to stop by La Mariana once in a while.
I came here for a big work party to wish two of my friends luck in their upcoming deployment to Afghanistan. Â Let's start with the (relative) highlights -
The good (ish)
- The food wasn't terrible
- Atmosphere was nice
The bad
- Most of our food came out cold or room temperature
- I make better nachos at home than they offered there
- Mashed potatoes were boiled potatoes that had been lightly smooshed.
The ugly
- It took an hour, maybe more, to get my first drink. Â A glass of wine. Â This is unacceptable
- It took 3 hours to order, receive, and consume food and to get checks. Â Most of the last hour was waiting for them to get the checks together. Â Many couples at this dinner had one person completely finish their food before the other person's food came.
- They added a 20% gratuity to all checks.
Here's the thing, guys. Â I worked in a restaurant. Â I know how that stuff goes. Â I've been slammed by big parties before. Â But you had over a week and a half notice about our party and yet you had 3 servers working the night. Â Our party had 40 people alone. Â That makes NO SENSE. Â Then, you ask us if we want separate checks and then, when the bill comes, say it's our fault for wanting separate checks. Â If you can't do separate checks, don't offer. Â
Finally, I ALWAYS tip at least 20%. Â Always. Â As a rule. Â Unless the service is atrocious. Â 3 hours for a glass of wine, some nachos, and a cold prime rib dinner (poor quality), with NO check ins and without even asking if anyone wanted another round of drinks? Â That's atrocious. Â When my date and I explained that we were NOT giving them 20% for the poorest service I've ever received, they started throwing a fit and emotionally blackmailed the person who planned the party into covering it. Â Lame. Â Totally lame. Â
I will NEVER go back there. Â This is the worst restaurant experience I've ever had AND an innocent person got to give them 20% tip for it.
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