What an ordeal this day was. After driving all the way here and eating, my girlfriend's car broke down, we had to get towed, and were left stranded in Oak Lawn by an unhelpful Mazda dealership. Luckily we got a ride to Midway from a friend and took an hour long trip home from there on the Orange.
Yet still...for Calumet Fisheries? Totally worth it.
I'd never had shrimp this flavorful before in my life. You can order by the piece, so my gf and I got 5 each. They were large, meaty, and buttery texture-wise, and didn't need any kind of dipping sauce at all. I would make the trip back just for these bad boys.
We also got the peppered salmon. Now in my experience, unless it's slathered in some kind of mayo sauce, salmon often times turns out kind of dry. Now I don't know how smoking does this, but the salmon here turned out almost creamy with a great flavor. I'd never had fish like this and really want to see how their other fish turn out.
We also got the fried scallops and fried oysters because, hell, we drove a far way from home to get here. These also turned out great, with the scallops being large and meaty and the oysters still retaining their tasty fishiness.
The staff here was great, too. As we and some other people were taking pictures, one of the employees invited us to take a look at their smoker. I was quite amazed to see just how many fish they were smoking at one time, but given how great the food was, I can see them moving rather quickly.
This place is a true Chicago landmark. Bring cash, bring wet naps, and bring a place to sit; a car will do nicely, provided that it still works when you're done eating.
As a native to the area where Calumet Fisheries is, I'd never really tried it until a handful of years ago when I was looking  for some place different to go.  Its been well worth the wait (and finally they are getting the kudos they deserve for the awesome and delicious stuff they have).
I'll admit I've only tried their smoked shrimp once (and enjoyed it) as I like to get their fried fish...the fish chips and shrimp most of the time. Â Its all freshly prepared so its nice and hot when I bring it in the house. Â
They also have more than just fries for sides...mushrooms, calamari, and sweet potato tots to name a few. Â
Yea there are no seats in the place and all they take is cash, but hey, they've been doing it right for so long, why fix what isn't broken?
If you are coming here, especially now during the season of Lent (pre-Easter), be prepared to wait as I did tonight....the place does fill up quickly (and you can tell by how far back you have to park) and depending on what you get, it may take a bit to get your orders...but be prepared to enjoy some great seafood!
Thank the lord Jehova and all his witnesses this place exists, if not I'd be forced to eat McDonalds or subway everyday I forgot my lunch. Â Like today. Â But wow man, this place really is wonderful. They even messed my order up, and it was still tremendously better food than anything I can remember having recently. They sent me home with a half frozen smoked trout, slaw and sweet potato nuggets. After zapping the trout I dug in and it was superb. I will for sure be back.
What a weird little spot. Just at the top of a bridge going over the Calumet river it looks like a fishing shack from the 1940s. Inside its all metal signs and a big wraparound counter. Thats it. So order it up and eat in your car like everyone else. Or return to work and make your lunchroom smell like a smoke house. The fish was devine. I will be a regular here. I don't need Tony Bourdain to tell me whats good. Its nice to be able to eat so close to work and not eat deep fried meat or other stuff that makes my cardiologist squeal with glee as he checks my gravy-blood.
You have not had real seafood until you've tried Calumet's seafood. My parents went to get some stuff at Horseshoe, and took me to this place to try out. My first thoughts were, Â "Hmm, smoked shrimp doesn't seem too appealing, and smoked salmon sounds pretty boring." Man, my thoughts were way off. Smoke Shrimp is AMAZING. Never have I thought shrimp could taste so good. Â Shrimp's not deveined though. Their smoked salmon in a few words : Moist, fatty, flavorful, addicting. I just had some leftover of their salmon just now, and I'm craving for some more.
Things that put me off were the fried foods. At first glance, I instantly knew it would be mediocre, due to it being battered up, and refrigerated, resulting in a not-so-crispy tasting. I had the fried onion rings, and shrimp. Onion rings was not that crispy, and shrimp were, but over seasoned with salt. Don't get me wrong, for the price, it's VERY good, but I feel that they can work on it more. Maybe have batter ready, but batter it up when it's ordered, mainly because there's not that many customers at one time (When I was there, there were only 3 customers including myself). But overall as a restaurant, their food is top notch, and I'm defiantly going back there whenever I'm near the area.
After my second visit I've finally gotten around to writing this review. Why I didn't after my first visit I have no idea, especially when it was easily one of the best overall meals in my lifetime. Maybe it was my conscience telling me to give it another try just to make sure I really did enjoy it as much as I believed. Who knows...
Anyhow, I am going to make this as basic as possible:
A. The fish is just damn fresh.
B. The prices are fair to exceptional, especially for the quality.
C. The people who work there are nice and helpful.
Finally, here is a list of what I ate in no particular order of greatness since I eat everything and like all food.
1. Chubs--Fatty and Oily, and oh so great.
2. Heads and Collars--I love the collar, as again it is fatty and for me fat is goodness as it's moist and buttery. Same goes for the head.
3. Salmon--The smoke flavor really comes through in this type of fish.
4. Sturgeon--Smokey, Buttery, and unreal.
5. Shrimp--Huge, moist, and great.
6. Trout--Simple flavor, with not as much fat, but still very tasty.
All in all I couldn't recommend this establishment enough if you like fish, especially fish that has been smoked and is extremely fresh. I will tell you though that if you are like me and have a larger appetite then you just might need to save up a bit when coming here. That however is just a slight drawback, as fresh fish is never cheap. By the way, the place is CASH ONLY, and there is nowhere to eat inside, so you either need to eat in your car on a cold day, or if it's nice, head to the park nearby just across the bridge. The latter I definitely recommend since you can sit by the lake and eat, and if you are on the lookout, their is usually a shaved ice vendor cart nearby and even a mango stand.
Enjoy Suckas'!!!
I've been here a few times for lunch while at work. I never would've tried them, but I saw them on Anthony Bourdain's TV show and I saw that they have smoked shrimp. SMOKED SHRIMP!!! I honestly didn't even know you could smoke a shrimp. Nothing special about the fried food. It doesn't touch Shrimp Express in Cal City. But the smoked salmon is on point. The smoked shrimp were, well, interesting. I like trying something different.
Review Source:Came here on a cold sunday afternoon, after seeing it featured on Anthony bourdain a long while back. Came here with a friend and we ordered a pound of salmon, pound of shrimp, a pound of fried oysters and a order of calamari.
 Smoked salmon was delicious. Great flavor and fresh. The smoked shrimp was also very good. Fresh and sweet, just the right amount of smoky flavor. the oysters were good, but not as juicy as i expected. the calamari was just okay, kind of over battered, and on the bland side.
 Will definitely come back for the salmon and smoked shrimp!
Go for smoked fish, salmon especially. Â If it's quiet, one of the guys will take you to the smoker, and get you to eat a fish eye (it's really not that bad). Â We went with a group of about 7, at around 2 on a Saturday afternoon, and went through a pound of smoked shrimp, three salmon pieces, two fish chips, two clam strips, and fries, and still had left overs.
There's no seating, or bathrooms, and it is cash only. If you're going in autumn or winter, dress appropriatly and picnic on the hood of your car watching the the vessels coming up the river and under the 95th st bridge. Â
Quality fish, nothing fancy, and that suits it just perfectly.
Great food period, if you are really into seafood. I tried this place after seeing them on "Check Please" one day. I could not believe that I had never been to CF after living in Chicago all my life and "Certified" seafood lover. I tried the garlic pepper salmon and the smoked jumbo shrimp. I was very impressed with this place. Even though it is a little pricey and a hole in the wall, but worth it to me.
I will be returning faithfully for the smoked shrimp at least. Friendly straight forward service. They will know my name soon.....
My gracious hosts took me here during a visit to Chicago. I suggest coming early in the morning to beat the crowd. We were able to chat with Carlos, who showed us where the smoke the fish and explained the process to us. It was really interesting and I really appreciate the extra effort he took to make our experience great.
We ordered the fried smelt, smoked sturgeon, smoked tuna, smoked garlic and pepper tuna, smoked salmon, smoked garlic and pepper salmon, and smoked shrimp. The smoked fish was a bit drier and tougher than I expected, almost like jerky. I think how moist or smoky it turns out really depends on the individual batch and type of fish. The smoked shrimp were delicious and fun to eat and I loved the fried smelt.
I recommend coming here at least for the adventure and to try something new. I'd come back just to try a different assortment of smoked fish.
Tips: Plan to picnic, so if you like tartar sauce and lemon wedges you should bring your own. Bundle up on a cold day or be prepared to eat in your car, there is no seating inside.
Well I didnt get shot and no car jacking getting there and back. Thats worth 2 stars alone! The place aint pretty BUT its clean and the people working there were very nice. The food was very good and unique in that I just dont get this quality of flavor from the same food in my neck of the woods. Its not a restaurant flavor. Its a homemade taste and its possibly worth getting your car put up on blocks and getting your wheels stolen.
The sauces are quality and everything was cooked perfectly. Price was fair too.
Bring your kevlar vest and an empty stomach & enjoy the good eats at Calumet Fisheries!
Not a good experience. Â I get there and others came in after me and the guys behind the what is pretty much a deli counter literally wait on people on each side of me and overlook me. Â So, I speak up and they were like. . . oh, okay, sorry [with the sincerity of a cheese sandwich, thanks dude] Â -- BUT --- keep waiting on the other people. Â Huh? Â Even one of the customers acknowledged I was there before. Unbelievable. Â I guess it's too much to think that in 2012 this place can't spring for one of those machines that spit out numbered tickets, they even make electronic ones now guys, and . . . you can take customers in order and that's called . . . being fair. Â Â But, since I grew up on the south side, okay, so forgive and forget. Â Â
Candidly, I am not a food snob.  And, in all fairness, I am not a big fan of much smoked fish.  But the smoked fish here was/is horrific -- globs of fish hacked off and sitting in the deli case.  But, because my husband saw it on Check Please, I asked for the small piece as possible to purchase and  try.  I had to saw a piece off for us to try it was so hard and dry.  We each had a morsel, predictably, I could not take it at all.  All I could think of is, this is what carcinogens actually taste like.   My husband, who loves to try any new food, also disliked it.  I can only guess it was over smoked or sitting the deli case way too long.   Ended up throwing it out. Â
Interestingly, one party before me ordered crab cakes and the deli worker stated, "they're made with imitation crab" is that okay? Â Why not call them "imitation" crab cakes then? Â Â Â Â
Also had fried shrimp and scallops. Â Fair at best -- portions were appropriate for the money, I will say. Â The side sauce they provide tastes like 2 separate and distinctive liquids they pour together to make one, ah, sauce, but it never quite marries in flavor. Â Husband said I should have passed on the smoked fish, thought the shrimp and scallops were worth going back, but, not regularly, nor soon.
Mom saw this place on Check Please and I arrived thinking we would have table service and a glass of wine. Â Uh, nope. Â It is strictly take away. Â You park on the street in the bike path. Â I guess you can park in the vacant lot a block away and apparently in the summer there are picnic tables.
We took a fillet of smoked salmon and OMG! Â It was fresh and moist and tasted wonderful! Â We also took half a dozen smoked JUMBO shrimp and they too were delicious. Â The fried shrimp were smaller and came with hot or mild sauce. Â We were assured the hot sauce was not too hot. Â AAAARRRGGG!!! Â NOT TRUE! Â The fried shrimp were incredible - best I have ever had.
We headed south to Mickey D's for beverages and plan to return with dates and a bottle of wine in the summer and enjoy the ambiance on the shores of the canal!
Um, Calumet Fisheries anyone? Â Yes please! Â The first time I went to Calumet I foolishly got the friend shrimp and oysters. Â I was promptly berated when I told my friend Ryan that I didnt get smoked fish. Â So, I journeyed back for round 2. Â Round 2 consisted of garlic pepper smoked trout and salmon. Â OMFG, is this place amazing. Â It tastes like fish butter. Â I dont know how else to describe the food so fish butter it is. Â Go see for yourself and enjoy this delicious hole in the wall gem.
PS. Â The fish are not sourced from Lake Calumet, which is a good thing.
They smoke their fish in-house, and it's where Anthony Bourdain went to get some good fish in Chicago. Â Need I say more? Â Well, I probably should: Â This place is not close to you...it's probably in a part of the city you didn't know existed, even though the Blues Brothers car jumping bridge scene was shot here. Â It's very far south and very far east, but if you're anywhere near the neighborhood it's a must. Â
They have an assortment of sea food smoked in different ways and even their fried catfish, shrimp, etc. are good. Â They are cash-only and there's no where to eat inside, so pack up some wet wipes, and plan to eat outside in your car.
AH! Fantastically fried fish. I wish I could return over and over again on the Metra. So it's kind of in the middle of nowhere (next to the Skyway) but it's still delicious. And also there's no seating (or tables outside) but it's still delicious. And also it's nothing but fried fish, smoked fish, grilled fish (and some fried macaroni, fries, other fried stuff, etc.) but it's still delicious.
One of the cooks, Carlos showed us the place around back and talked about the history of the place with LTH and the history of the place in general.. It was great. One of my favorite places in Chicago. There's a sign inside regarding the fact that this is not a chain restaurant. I hope it never becomes one.
I've been to heaven and its name is Calumet Fisheries. Â Perfect. Â If you hate smoked fish, get the fried. Â If you hate fish, get the shrimp. Â If you hate fried fish, get the smoked. Â Rinse and repeat.
This place was featured in the original Blues Bros Movie. Â James Beard Foundation gave it a huge award. Â Anthony Bourdain was nuts over it. Â
It looks like a bridge tender shack next to the river. Â It's been there for 80 years and looks it. Â They've done it the same way since then.
Get the smoked shrimp or the smoked pepper salmon. Â Best ever.
The food here is decent, but nothing I would go out of the way to find. Â The guys that work here are friendly and fast. Â I tried the following:
FRY FISH - I'm not sure what kind of fish, but $7 got me a pretty good amount of fried fish pieces and they were pretty good. Â The tarter sauce went well, as tarter sauces and fish go. Â I would try the smoked salmon next time around.
FRY SHRIMP - $5 got me half order of friend shrimp, which at first I thought were the fish when I ate them. Â The texture was more fish-like than shrimp like. Â I dipped them in both tarter sauce and the hot sauce, but felt like neither sauce did the shrimps justice. Â
Notes:
-Cash only
-Plenty of street parking
-There's no place to sit and eat, plan on taking it to go
How have I lived so close to this place for so many years without ever stopping in?
Calumet Fisheries is a total gem. My boyfriend and I were in the area one day and we were looking for some sort of culinary adventure, and thanks to Yelp we found this place. We got the shrimp dinner and a few other things and it was FANTASTIC.
I like how it is no BS but at the same time the people are nice and helpful. They could tell we were a little overwhelmed and didn't know what to order, but they were patient.
I can't wait to go back. I am also 99% sure their hot sauce is Frank's which made me a very happy camper. A+.
Smokey and fishy. But what's not to like about that?
The peppercorn and garlic salmon is delicious, especially with the hot sauce dip, but after several hearty mouthfuls, I was really wishing for a lemon to squeeze over it.
The trout is less heavy, clean, and very flavorful.
Though you might turn away from ordering the shrimp since they're not deveined, don't wimp out on an opportunity to taste them smoked! Run a plastic knife down the back of a peeled shrimp, pry it open, and use the knife to pull out the large strand. Easy. 5 seconds of effort for delicious, poop-free shrimp.
The industrial surroundings enhance the charm of this riverside seafood shack, but once you've received your food, drive straight ahead for about 3 minutes until you can't go any further. Park your car and walk straight to the lake and enjoy your meal overlooking the waters.
I am shocked by the 4 and 5 star reviews, apparently a lot of folk just get all gitty about being in an industrial wasteland. They buy some mediocre food and feel like they are donating their not so hard earned money to charity.
The fried food tastes highly processed, the breading is cloying and heavy. If you don't eat it outside it will b mush before you can do a u-turn on the bridge.
The smoked fish is fine, but they charge a premium.
The onion rings are bullshit frozen mass produced gmo crap. The sweat potato tots are gimmicky and frozen as well. Â The fried shrimp don't even qualify in my top ten old school Chicago Swimp joints.
I would say if you are in the area grab some smoked salmon, whitefish, or sable, but unless you work at the coal yards or in shipping I am not so sure what you would be doing here.
It's just not that good, really?
So good.
If you like smoked anything then smoked peppercorn garlic salmon steaks & jumbo shrimp will be no exception. This shack serves up some truly flavorful stuff. Only *potential* problem is that they don't offer any sort of seating, so it's carry out only. That being said there is a park just over the nearby bridge where you can sit by the lake. That's what we did & it worked out famously.
P.S. The peppercorn/garlic salmon works really well as a lox ingredient. Highly recommend using it for this purpose.
P.P.S. The fries are better than the onion rings. The onion rings weren't crispy enough for my taster.
I went down here after driving past the place for decades and thinking it was a typical Chicago shrimp shack - which it is to a degree. I came for something specific: smoked fish pieces because I had seen Anthony Bourdain and read about the James Beard Award. I drive the Skyway all the time so decided to hop off at Indy-Blvd and go look for Calumet Fisheries.
You park your car behind all the cop cars, city sanitation trucks, and highway crews (this place is a hit with Laborers, Cops, and city workers). Most people were getting the fried shrimp, and other fried stuff, but since I saw Anthony Bourdain going crazy as he sat and ate his smoked fish I went for the smoked fish!
I selected the smoked salmon and Trout (Pepper & Garlic). Both were freaking amazing. The rich fish oils and smoked flavor of the salmon (you get to choose pieces) would do well on any fancy party tray. The garlic and pepper is a house specialty and was also amazing. I bought these to take home and had them with toasted bread, a little mustard, but mostly plain in my hands. The fish oils just taste so good (and are pretty good for you). I would go for the house specials which are the smoked fish items (they have whole fish), EEL, Sable, etc.
If there is something you want to make sure you try I would suggest you call ahead before the lunch rush.
They have a tiny little corner and the little shack has the smoke house right behind it. When I was there I saw the dudes tending to the smoke fires. How cool is that?
The industrial site next door has a security truck sitting there - so I think they do not want you parking on that piece of property so you are forced to park in the small number of spots right before the 95th street bridge.
If I had a place on the Michigan shore this would be a place to stop off at on the way over. Easy detour off the Skyway.
I have been a regular customer of Calumet Fisheries since I was a kid as I mentioned in my First to Review comments. Â I absolutely love this landmark shrimp house where I have experienced the best breaded fried shrimp in town....
On my last and most recent visit on Friday April 20th.... I purchased two (2) large orders of shrimp, fries and drinks to go.
While the shrimp was plump and juicy, the breading surely not the same I had experienced time and time again through the years. Â The shrimp seemed to be coated in a corndog consistency of breading..... smooth and of equal thickness of golden color.... This is not the breading that made this place famous long before the Blue Bros. film had any positive effects.... What happened ? Â Where are my crunchy pieces of deli sh breading at the bottom of my container?
The smoke fish, while pricey, looks exactly as it always did in the case.
I am reserving final judgment until I return a few more times  to Calumet Fisheries, maybe it was a bad night?
..I want to visit Bob's Shrimp House in Hammond, Indiana for the first time as I have heard RAVE reviews about their shrimp...
This places smokes the competition!!
I've only had the smoked salmon and smoked trout tail, but both were amazing. The salmon served as a few dinners w/ some sliced apples, nuts, and cheeses. Prices weren't that bad either.
This is totally worth the trip from the heart of the city...and next time I might take a cooler with me so I can stop by on my long bike rides.
Swoon.
Okay 5 stars it is for smoked items!
Of course I found this place because of No Reservations, how else would i wonder outside of downtown Chicago being a tourist?!
Definitely worth the rental =)
Smoked salmon- just had the perfect texture and taste, I'm not a big fan of smoked salmon to begin with, I order my philly rolls with fresh salmon for those who know it normally comes with smoked salmon... anyway, this smoked salmon taste was nothing near to what you can buy else where or well from what I've experienced.
Smoked shrimp- the shrimp had a suttle taste of smokiness which gave it a great taste and the shrimp had great texture.
Fried smelts- perfect with eaten nice and hot with some hot sauce dipping.
Smoked Trout- very good!
We came when the fishes have been smoked and refrigerated, but when it's pretty freshly smoked, like that day, it is completely different in taste and texture. We were lucky to have a taste of some trout that was made so we can see the difference, perfect. You didn't need anything with these smoked fish, no crackers needed.
Overall, very good and well worth the stop when you're in Chicago. When I'm back, I'll be sure to stop in here! We even bought a couple more to bring back home to our friends as a part of their souvenir gifts! Hey, it's way better than shot glasses or key chains =) Â
And use a fork, your hands will stay clean most of the time.. until you get the the shrimp, unless you have someone peeling them for you ;)
CASH only of course! Enjoy!
Born and raised on the south side, I have had the privileged to make calumet fisheries part of my weekly lunch schedule. It's awesome that Bourdain covered them, now I know they won't be running out of business anytime soon!!
P.S. They only accept cash and there is no place to sit. It's all old school here!
They could smoke my hand and I would take pleasure in eating it.
A friend and I rode our bikes here from Harwood Heights in the Summer. A great trip and the food was worth the ride.
I'm happy Bourdain hit this place up, because I may have never found out about it through my yelp searches. When we got there, they were smoking fish. So we rested for a bit as we chatted it up with the "smoke master" outside. He gave us some tips, history, and knowledge on the place. If anyone remembers the scene in the first Blues Brothers where they jump the bridge, that was right in front of Calumet.
Another friend drove up, so we maxed out. We had their Fried Oysters. Fried Smelt, Smoked Salmon, Smoked Trout, Smoked Shrimp, and a side of macaroni salad and coleslaw. The smelt was one of the best pieces of fried food I've ever put in my mouth. I thought the fried oysters were just okay, probably because I enjoy them most when there just raw.
The smoked shrimp was great. I love peel and eat shrimp. Their typically larger, more firm (yet still tender), and have better flavor. The Smoked trout and Salmon were outrageously good. Excellent crust from the black peppercorn and other spices they rub on before the smoke process. The macaroni salad was a nice carb to throw in there, but I wasn't a fan of the slaw'. I like crunchy vinegary slaw, this was kinda minced mush.
Calumet Fisheries is blast. Its worth the hype and the drive. If your not taking your food home or eating it in your car, have fun sitting outside. It's strange, but I enjoyed taking in the industrial atmosphere, the bridge, and the river while me and my two friends snacked communally on some of great grub.
I ventured to this off the beaten path gem on a surprise day trip with one of my foodie friends. We do this often and he never tells me where we were going so I've learned not to beg for hints/guess. My expectations we low when we got off the highway near Gary (no offense Gary but there is a reason a highway was built over you). Needless to say, I was pumped when we arrived since I've heard Bourdain rave about this place.
I was not disappointed. Luck would have it that they were smoking that day so everything was super fresh. My friends got his usual favorite, the pepper smoked salmon and the incredibly knowledgeable counter guy recommended the smoked trout too. Who were we to argue. Next time I want to try to smoked sturgeon which came highly recommended. Also added some fried clams. Warning, eat them slowly as the hot water inside tend to explode. Love the trout's delicate texture and smokey yet fishy taste. We took the salmon home to sprinkle it over a salad and I already can't wait.
Not sure when I'll be back but I hope it's soon. Love supporting local businesses like this that are knowledgeable, passionate about their craft and will talk your ear off one you get them going.
Warning: If you don't strong fish smells and seeing tons of fish heads staring back at you, pass on this place.
How does one of the most infamous eateries for "foodies" in Chicago only have around 100 reviews? Oh that's right, it takes forever to get there and is virtually impossible to access via public transportation. Well, unlike you rubes I have a 1995 Infiniti chariot to take me to the far reaches of Chicagoland.
So on a nice, sunny Autumn Chicago day we braved the freeways and weekend traffic to pilgrimage down to 95th for some smoked and fried fishes.
We had to do the Anthony, of course. Fried smelt and shrimp, smoked salmon and trout. Items are fried to order, and you can pick your smoked fish steak of choice.
Then take it outside and eat (because there is no room inside!). Just be careful not to stand on that bridge when they are bringing boats to winterize. Because they can't see you and soon you'll realize that the ringing isn't just a bad memory from 'Nam, but that bridge is actually going up! Run. Then eat.
I now have 5 pounds of smoked fish in my house! Kate G. came back to visit!!! and wanted to hit up Calumet Fisheries. Since going to South 95th is not something I do on a regular basis, I made the most out of my trip.
Got smoke salmon and smoked trout in black pepper/garlic. Super rich and fishy with a great texture. Smoked shrimp which is about the size of my face-a pound gets you about a dozen. Â Fried oysters and I wanted fried clam stripes but they accidentally gave me fried scallops instead. The scallops were good but got too hot and mushy, the oysters were fine..but I couldn't really eat more than 3 and a pound ended up being about 2 dozen. EEks
cons: hot sauce is not hot. fried stuff got too mushy
additional pros: an awesome biker thought I had just finished "smoking" which is why I ordered so much food and when he found out I was in my right state of mind, told me he wanted to get with me---if it wasn't for his wife. 50 year old bikers hitting on me for my ability to consume a lot of food is probably the best compliment EVER.
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