El Patron #3

Went here in error.  We thought it was still El Torro Bronco!  The sign is still up out at Monaco, but  we couldn't tell because the only sign outside the actual restaurant says "FOOD".  We went in anyway, big mistake!!

Where do I start?? Well....the hostess situation was awkward, we had to seat ourselves, kinda strange.  There was a super loud DJ playing and he kept stopping the music and yelling over it.  There was a bar area, but only 1 girl was dancing....just strange.

The service was slow.  We had  to point at the beers we wanted on the menu because our waitress couldn't understand us over the obnoxious music.  We finally got our drinks, had to ask twice for water, and the chips and salsa.  The salsa was watery.

For our entrees, I chose the carne adobada.  My husband chose the appetizer sampler for his.  After waiting for some time, they were finally  served.  My beans were the worst beans ever. They ran through my fork.  Gross!! The rice was about a teaspoon full, and was about  the only edible thing on my plate.  The carne adobada was chewy, gristly, and tough.  The menu stated it was "very flavorful".  I feel bad for the person who wrote that because it was totally flavorless.  They obviously have no idea what real flavor tastes like!

My husband's sampler was just about equal  in grossness.  The nachos were burnt, the taquitos were soaked in grease, and the quesidilla was just a tortilla with some velveeta squished in between cheap tortillas.

Bad, Bad, Bad. Can't come up with one positive aspect of our dinner here.  Will defiantly not be back.

Plus, it's scary there, I thought our radio would be jacked while we were there!

My sister and I stopped here for lunch and were warmly greeted by the staff.  Not surprisingly, the place was dead for an early Wednesday afternoon, but patrons did start to filter in shortly after us.

Big, beautiful, and exciting dinning room with lots of fun decor.  (I bet this place would be great for a large group or party!)  Friendly staff.  Large menu.  I can't imagine that you won't find something appealing here.  The lunch menu looked great too: $3.99 for just enough food.  Then again, I eat like a bird most of the time, so 2 tacos or 1 burrito is oftentimes plenty!

My sister and I ordered the same dish:  a combination plate of a burrito and enchilada with rice and beans.  Now I'm far from a connoisseur of Mexican food, but it was delicious!  Very tasty and very filling.  The bar menu was quite impressive, but we opted for a simple Corona.  Had it not been 0 degrees outside, we might have gone with a margarita or some other equally delectable fruity mixed drink.

Good food and good prices.  Prompt and friendly service.  El Patron III is definitely worth a visit or two if you're in the Monaco/Evans area.

My only complaint was that there wasn't any music playing.  Perhaps the staff forgot to switch the tunes on because the lunch crowd hadn't arrived yet, but it was eerily quiet for a Mexican restaurant.  I'm sure the lack of tunes was a fluke, so I won't hold that against El Patron.

One tip:  this place is quite hidden from the road, so watch for the big MEXICAN FOOD sign near the Sears parking lot.  Follow this neon beacon to savory Mexican dishes.

Tucked away in a large desolate parking lot, a red neon sign loudly proclaims "FOOD."  As you get closer, you can see that the "MEXICAN" part of the sign is non-functional.  Some people will have you believe that if you go to a Mexican restaurant and you are the only gringo (or half-gringo) in the joint, then it must be authentic.  And if it is authentic, it is good.  According to this logic, this Taco Bell I used to go to in California is very authentic.  Well, I am no authority on the authenticity of Mexican food, nor do I care to be, but I can say that my wife and I were the only non-Latinos patrons in El Patron.

The space is rather dank and cave like.  There are some charming flourishes, but overall the atmosphere wreaks of crusty old restaurant furniture.  There was a host's table, but no host and no sign instructing to seat yourself.  After looking confused for a few minutes, we ventured in to grab our spaces.  They serve alcohol here, which was a good start.  On the other hand, we were the only table that wasn't served chips and salsa upon seating (or ever during our visit).

The menu is long and extensive, ranging from classic combinados to seafood to the very Americanized (hamburger and fries).  Feeling a bit frisky, we went with a two person a parrillada para dos, selecting shrimp, pastor and carnitas as meats.  The parrillada comes served on a massive platter, sizzling from the fire underneath.  The feast is served with a baked potato, beans, melted cheese and avocado slices.  The carnitas were quite good, clean, tender, and succulent.  Everything else was a hot mess.  The al pastor was a failure, dried out, over spiced, and burnt to a crisp.  The shrimp was completely unseasoned, overcooked and was only flavored a fishiness that was a complete turnoff.  

So to recap.  Cold beer = good.  Service = lacking.  Food = hit and miss.  And when they miss, they miss.  I can't say that this place is worth a return trip.