This is an awful place for anything but hog slop. Â A hog might eat here and be satisfied, but hogs eat any kind of rotten or uncooked food. Â Vile "food" and surly "service" are the best that can be said for the Whitman House. Â We should have left when we both commented that only one other couple was dining there. Â
When you see the Whitman House, keep driving - don't stop.
To celebrate their anniversary, my parents picked out this restaurant for a "fancy dinner". Â It wouldn't have been my choice, but it seems pickin's are slim for great places to eat in Cape Cod. Â
The atmosphere of the restaurant is certainly more upscale, but that's about as fancy as it gets at Whitman House. Â
The food was so-so. Â Definitely not fine dining, so if that's what you're after, look elsewhere. Â They start you out with plastic-wrapped crackers and bread sticks with cheese spread. Â Then they move on to rolls and a family-style salad bowl (not bad). Â Then the entrees: Â lobsters are good, and the my mother loved her Seafood Newburg. Â My brother and I wanted to try some local seafood that was not lobster. Â We ended up getting the scrod as the striped bass was not yet in season. Â It was simply prepared with some butter and breadcrumbs. Â It tasted fine, but it was boring, and the breadcrumbs were mushy. Â My father ordered the baked local filet of sole, but ended up with the stuffed sole. Â
Prices are very reasonable for everything, which was a relief. Â There's nothing worse than getting mediocre food and then having to pay through the nose for it. Â
Service was spotty. Â For the most part he was fine, but I think our waiter was a little flustered by the large bus party that was there the same time we were. Â When we asked if my father got the stuffed sole rather than the regular sole he ordered, we were told that he received the right entree. Â Then when I ordered a creme de menthe cake for dessert, I received some sort of creme de menthe sundae. Â I told the waiter this was not what I ordered, but he insisted there was no such dessert as creme de menthe cake. Â He offered to get me something else, but I went ahead and ate the sundae anyway. Â I had to ask everyone at the table if I had imagined the cake on the menu. Â I had not. Â Fortunately, the waiter came by to say he was sorry and comped us for the dessert. Â This meant a lot to me. Â
Some other yelpers mentioned a Holy Bible in the foyer. Â Unfortunately I missed this. Â I would have found that so amusing!
Woo, the Whitman House. Where to begin...
Let's start out with some brief history of the place: it's a restored 18th century farmhouse or something like that.
Now, onto the review.
I walked in and sat down in my chair. When I tried to adjust my position in the chair, I realized I couldn't move. Then I realized my shirt was stuck to the back of my chair. Then I realized that there was something sticky on the back of my chair that was keeping me from moving. I don't know what it was and quite frankly, I'd rather not find out.
Then, the waiter arrived to take drink orders. He reminded me of Owen from Dodgeball. He was a little  awkward, yet endearingly so.
Then, the waiter came over with the bread basket. At first, I was really excited. Then I realized that the breadsticks and crackers in the basket were wrapped in plastic, not homemade. It was served with some kind of "cheese" dip (and I use the term "cheese" loosely; it was more like a goo) that was probably as old as the restaurant. I avoided it because I wasn't in the mood to enjoy those breadsticks twice.
Are you a vegetarian? Well, you're in luck, because the Whitman House has accommodations! Their vegetarian menu has 2 great selections to choose from-- pasta with marinara sauce and pasta with vegetables! How extensive!
As a pseudo-vegetarian, I decided to order the pasta with vegetables. It was oily and tasteless. However, they say with enough parmesan cheese, anything can taste good, so I dumped the entire container on the pasta and it was tolerable.
If any of the above things appeal to you, The Whitman House is your place! For those of you whose palates are working, do yourselves a favor and take the 5 minute drive to Provincetown.
Well, they certainly do love themselves some Jesus over there at the Whitman House. Â It was a bit weird. Â When you walk into the lobby you are greeted by the Holy Bible. Â Also, there's a painting of the last supper over the doorway into one of the dining rooms. Â Shouldn't restaurants be secular?
The food was just kinda meh. Â The service was slow and the waiters were aloof. Â I'm giving them an extra star because they didn't skimp me on the scallops but really it's better just to stay away from this place.
Ah the Whitman House, the place to go for a truly disappointing and bizarre dining experience.
As has been mentioned by other reviewers, we should have known to leave when we were served a soup bowl sized serving of what most closely resembles whipped Cheez Whiz. How anyone can consume that revolting paste is beyond me, but it certainly set the tone for the meal to come.
I had been craving oysters on the half shell all day, so I was thrilled to see them on the menu. Â As I wasn't very hungry, I decided to order half a dozen, and a cup of soup. Whitman House did not approve. In order to get an appetizer and "nothing else," you have to pay a $4 service charge. Wait, what? My cup of soup was $3.95. So...the service charge is more than the food I'm ordering? Does that not seem very, very wrong? I was of course upset by this, and the waitress informed me that the charge is for the "cheese, crackers, homemade bread, and family-style salad." But here's the thing. I tried to stay at least five feet away from the nasty cheez bowl at all times. I was not interested in salad, and...isn't bread free at most restaurants? Also, if I really didn't feel like paying the service charge, there are any number of ways to get around it. We were a party of 6. What if my friends had each ordered an appetizer with their entrees and passed them over to me when they arrived? Silliness. Pure and simple. And while $4 certainly isn't going to break the bank, Â I decided to forgo any food on principle and instead sipped on a Sam Summer, while my friends choked down decidedly bland and uninspired seafood dinners. The prices? Outrageous for the quality of food that is served. There is nothing redeeming about this place.
On top of all this, the Whitman House is...creepy. The clientele is mostly 60+ and the waitstaff looked like they were pulled from a Munster's episode.
Conclusion? Stay away. Just turn around, and go somewhere else. Anywhere else.
This review is for the tavern only. I went here with my neighbor for dinner. The space was pub-like but I was immediately disturbed by the Holy Bible in the foyer. It felt like a funeral home trying to be a restaurant.
The pub menu was typical. The "special" scallop casserole was bland, too watery/ buttery and flavorless. Very disappointing.
Although I heard the hamburgers were good, my experience with the food and bible will keep me away.
We ended up here by circumstance, during a much-needed break from Ptown and Wellfleet tourist flocks. And for this escape, the Whitman House is rather wonderful. The decoration is all antiquey and charming. When we were there after 8pm, the place was virtually empty (I'm guessing it's more crowded during the dinner special hour from 5 to 6, packed with lively seniors). It smelled vaguely of mothballs when we first entered. The waitstaff is deadpanned and/or Eastern European - odd, for an American traditional restaurant that's been around for 120 years. And yet, all of this is part of Whitman House's charm.
But more importantly, our food was delicious, which is obviously the most important part - particularly our main courses. Both of our fish dishes (blackened seabass and scallops) were cooked and seasoned sublimely. Our entrees seriously rivaled all of the super-expensive 'nicer' restaurants that we've frequented in Ptown.
Note: We, my fellow diner and I, are about 30. So, if none of the above info does anything for you, just take your mother here....or your grandmother, rather. The food is delish and the ambiance couldn't be more charmingly "Cocoon" if they tried; this said, though, the tavern section is livelier with drunk 30 and 40somethings, so there's something here for everyone *not* looking for a faaaaaaaabulous night out.
If Zero stars was an option, that's what I'd give this place. Â Where to begin? Â The bright orange spread cheese was fair warning -- should've left then. Â But nooooooo.
To the heart of it -- the food is worse than awful. Â Three nice people at my table ordered Cod and NONE of them could choke it down. Â And this is on Cape Cod! Â The hard, yet slimy, baked potato was not only badly prepared, it was bad. Â As in spoiled.
I could go on and on but enough. Â Go anywhere else.
My husband and I enjoy eating lunch at the Whitman House- dinner is way way too spotty. They make a damned good burger and my husband really likes their pasta, both of which make for a nice lunch. That being said, I had the worst steak of my life there (they were out of Prime Rib), full of gristle, tough......and as they were also out of baked potatoes I had to settle for the rice, which was OK, nothing special. They have been "out" of baked potatoes the last three times we ate dinner there! Stick with lunch!
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