Artist's Cafe

Well, to be honest, not sure if I would give this place a one star review. I am sure in the homeless kitchens they cook tastier meals and are more happy to serve their lice-ridden "customers".

We passed the place several times and it looked cool and artsy. There were quite a few patrons so as usual when in a strange town, I choose to eat at a place where there are a lot of people...the chances of food poisoning are fewer. I've been in similar places in other cities and while the food might not be the best, they offer a good and unique local experience.

So after passing this place a few times we decided to go in. It was somewhat empty since it was on a Sunday but enough patrons to inspire confidence. We ordered two espressos and got two ice waters. The espressos were the soggiest, nastiest espresso I've had in my life. It reminded me of a dingy place in Athens by the docks which served similar slosh but was called "Turkish coffee". Looking at the menu, it had a distinct Greek flavor so my guess is the owners are probably Greek and thus the nasty choice of sour coffee.

My wife ordered and "Al Capone" burger, I ordered a bacon burger. We wanted to each have a glass of wine, but sorry - no liquor license. At the same time there are over 50 bottles of booze hanging at the bar. At least have the mercy to pull them down, so people won't be tempted. I order bottled water since the glasses or water in them have a stink that could probably induce vomit from a skunk.

We get our food. Pretty ample portions. My wife cuts into her burger to discover a distinct bluish tinge to the burger. I guess Al couldn't give this one concrete shoes and decided to stick him in a burger...that's what it looked like, at least. I didn't even dare dig into mine. We bolted fast out of there.

For those that are on S. Michigan Ave. I'd suggest going up a few blocks north and visiting Cafe Baci - awesome espresso, fresh-made sandwiches and pizzas, top ingredients and a lot cleaner atmosphere. It doesn't have the decadent artist-fallen-on-hard-times look and feel (and taste) of the Artist's Cafe but  if you want to keep your stomach, it is a sensible choice.

Nightmare.  Stopped in for breakfast. First we ordered Bloody Mary's.  "No liquor license".  Fine, O.J. and water.  I had a long string floating in my water and MH had lipstick on his glass.  Asked for a bottled coke.  Out of bottled coke.  Fine bottled water then.  Then we tried to order. Waffles.  "No waffles".  OK, that's it!  Check please.  Tried to charge us for the lipstick O.J.  No. Never again.

Don't see the hate here, it's located right near Millenium Park, go here on a crisp spring morning and you got it made here. Prices are to be expected considering it is downtown.  Can't speak for Lunch, but the breakfast is above par.