Conspiracy Room

This room has a long bar and is quite large. It's part of the building of the Uptown (all one owner). It was a bit hard to find as they had the door locked and closed when I got there. They put out a sign later.

They hosted a vegan buffet on weekends here. It's quite a large venue, which allowed them to show the movie "forks over knives" while we ate and chatted. The venue is old and outdated, but I suppose that is half the charm.

At the bar, they had a small TV. The prepared a fresh juice bar (kale, carrot, lemon, etc.), which was really tasty. They also had organic vodka, which I was unimpressed with. The coffee was pretty gross. For the buffet, they had couscous, rice, stir fry, blueberry pancakes, and good sauces. I think this was the first time I had seen real maple syrup in a restaurant city since moving to Kansas City 3 years ago. The cookies were a bit bland.

The staff was quite friendly and talkative as were the patrons (who showed up at the latter half of the buffet). I showed up when they opened and it was a good hour before ANYONE showed up. Really weird :( This was a meet-up event, but everyone showed up in groups, which made it a bit awkward to mingle, but I had fun anyhow.

There was one staff member who was a recent convert to vegan-ism who was a bit kooky and really turned me off, but I suppose all to their own. He sure had a LOT of conspiracy theories which fit right into the venue.

I haven't seen any more vegan buffet options since this event and suppose it's due to the poor showing. Personally, the amount they charged for the types of foods they were serving didn't add up in my book. They could have prepared smaller quantities and tastier options for less price, but what do I know? Isn't a buffet the antithesis of healthy eating (which they are promoting)? So sad, as I could eat everything there (I'm lactose intolerant) and it was all organic.

OK, so the set designers from Scarface and the Indiana Jones movies got together and decorated the Conspiracy Room.  It could be worse?  It could look  like the set of the Golden Girls?  Or Mama's Family?  While not so aesthetically pleasing, it is unique and worth a stopping in for a few drinks and a show or two....or trying out their new Sunday gluten free vegan brunch!!

Gluten free and vegan food options are few and far between here in Kansas City, so Uptown/Conspiracy Room's new concept in a welcome addition to our current meager choices. The owner is a fairly recent vegan and gluten free convert who, having experienced some notable health improvements and weight loss after changing his diet, decided to put this brunch together.  It's been running about a month now, and while it's already pretty tasty, I have high hopes that it will continue to improve as the cooks get even more familiar with this type of cooking.  (So NOT easy!)

I've stopped in twice now for brunch, and can honestly say that it's been an enjoyable eating experience each time.  I'm not a foodie though, I have to admit.  I'm not a picky eater either. Food is food and I'm always glad to have it.  And my food consumption situation is a bit different from most people's, having eaten a strictly (almost) gluten free, dairy  free, bland diet for about a year.  Seriously,  the brunch seemed like a feast to me!

There are plenty of pasta options, a few vegetable dishes, a small salad bar, and soup, besides dessert.  Alternative grain options, like quinoa and rice were incorporated into the menu, and today, they had blueberry pancakes made with what tasted like corn.  Darn good.(Alright, they were slightly dry, but nothing some organic maple syrup didn't fix.)  They even ran out of pancakes at one point, so that proves they were enjoyed en masse. I went back twice for biscuits and gravy.  It was sooo amazing to eat biscuits again. It's seemed like an eternity since I last had a freakin' biscuit. They didn't taste quite like a typical greasy biscuit, but they were fluffy and doughy and they made me super happy, so that was more than enough for me. Last week they had oatmeal cookies.  I ate a plateful.  Yes, there is a pattern here.  I become a carbaholic when I can.

Additionally, each week features a health-talk by a locals involved in the alternative health-care industry.  The last two were an MD and a DC.  Based on my two visits, there was quite a lot of audience participation throughout the talks.  Such an excellent way for people to swap and compare their stories, and it promotes some much needed solidarity to those who suffer in their gluten free worlds.  

As a side note, brunch features live music.  Not a big fan of this, but only because I like to talk, and my voice never seems to carry over Bob Dylan covers and flamenco love songs.

FYI:  Kids are welcome, even encouraged.  It would be a great way to introduce them to healthier food options.

One more thing: You will soon be able to order and pick up organic groceries here.  Awesome, right?

My final thoughts:  You should try this brunch at least once, just to say you did.  If you are totally into greasy food dripping in butter, this isn't the place for you, but it can't hurt to try it.  It's better for your body, and you might discover that gluten free vegan doesn't have to taste like cardboard.  And how cool is it that things like this are happening in KC?  This place has some hope after-all!!

First off, let me explain that I was really kind of looking forward to this event. For days.  I spent time on the 'Net catching up on Bowie trivia.  I wanted to meet the man and compliment him on his performance in The Prestige.

Yeaaaaah.... we went to the David Bowie Luau, lightheartedly/halfway expecting THE REAL DAVID BOWIE to be there.  As the guest of honor.  So much Fail.... [Shudder]

Sorry, my shattered expectations are still huddled over there in the corner - wailing " WHYYY... " and sobbing uncontrollably, muttering over and over about never getting that hour and a half of my life back... I'll have to go give them a "there, there" and a cookie in a moment.

First off, FALSE ADVERTISING - the event site did *not* say **anything** anywhere about a David Bowie IMPERSONATOR -- it said the 1st 50 people would be " Laid " by **David Bowie.**  ( Ok, "laid" translates to " Lei'd " which was understood, but STILL! )

<a href="http://www.yelp.com/events/photos/TOIH9p13awmc-kNbNvgd-A?selected=Vut48MqYL4SpK6zuEdHKtA">http://www.yelp.com/even…</a>

I should probably give them another 1/2 star for the Egyptian statues, but I just can't bring myself to care...

Anyhow, we arrived fashionably late at 7:30, and there was the Bowie Impersonator at the door.  Weak sauce.  Nothing against the guy personally, really, but he looked more like Ric Okasec from The Cars than Bowie. ( And for the record, I did wish him a good night when we left. )

They had Labyrinth playing silently on the wall, and maybe 1-2 Bowie songs played from the DJ.  Okay so far, but the place is REALLY EMPTY...

Then it deteriorated...

Crappy dance music started up (not even Bowie related), repetitive images replaced the movie, and we were both left thinking, WTF???

Honestly, I don't think I saw more than 11 people in the whole place the whole time we were there.  Totally, horribly LAME - and embarassing.  A SHOT of Bacardi for $6??  In a PLASTIC CUP, not even a bar glass?? Really!?  Hell - for that, I might as well stop by Price Chopper and buy a d--n bottle.  I kept apologizing to SixFootTwo that this was ***NOT*** what I was expecting. At all.

We gave it a decent shot, really, but it Never. Got. Any. Better.

Beam me up, Scotty - there's no intelligent life down here...

I ended up buying a Polish hot dog + chips 'n soda from the street vendor outside when we left - that ended up being the highlight of the night.  He was a cool guy, and a pretty good cook.
( Support the locals, people! )

Never planning on going back to this facility -- I can honestly say this was lamer than the train exhibit at Union Station, which makes the David Bowie Luau the Lamest Thing I've Seen in Kansas City.

// Not an award you want to "win" :-P