The Strand Smokehouse

This place sucks! When I saw them building this restauarant I was excited for a new bar/restaurant/beer garden type of place in the neighborhood. When i went there I was thoroughly dissapointed.

The place looks great and has a great atmosphere but they are trying way to hard to pull off the "hipster" bullshit feel. The food was expensive and not very good. The beer was expensive and didnt taste good. I'm not even sure if they have regular ketchup and mustard to help you eat some of there dry food. They have a full bar but dont stock normal mixers like Coke, Sprite, Seltzer, club soda etc. Your forced to get there homemade Ginger Ale with one of there drinks that tastes like home made trash. The employees have shitty attitudes and think there better than you cause there like OMG HIPSTERS AND THIS GINGER ALE IS LIKE TOTALLY ORGANIC MAN.

They always have bands playing while your eating. The bands are usually playing loud and awful music. The band consists of 5 people from either Williamsburg or Ohio in overalls. When I was there they were playing the banjo so loud I couldn't speak to or hear anything that my friends were saying. I think they do this on purpose so you can't tell your buddy next to you how bad everything is.

I wish this place would turn back into a blockbuster. It is a waste of a good space!

Much was left to be wanted from "Strand Smokehouse", as this Astoria BBQ joint struck out in my book. I checked this place out for the first time on a Saturday evening with some friends, and was pretty disappointed that it didn't live up to my expectations. Let's just say that my taste buds were left Stranded from experiencing any real flavor that evening.

Strike 1
FOOD:
Ok, so first impressions are that this food will rival any of the places down south. They have these huge slabs of beef brisket and short ribs laid on top of wood carving boards, with juice oozing out from all sides, and their knives slicing through the tender meat like butter. The crispy layer of spices will make you salivate where you're standing. Seriously!
So, one mac and cheese, a slab of corn bread, a cup of pulled pork, and $16 later, I find myself apologizing to my taste buds and my wallet .
The Pulled Pork was literally so one dimensional in flavor, lacked salt, and lacked sweetness of any kind. Most of all, it tasted burnt. To my surprise, when I got the bottom of my cup, I had a large burnt layer of pork. I rest my case.
The corn bread was incredibly dry and overall, just a crumbly frustrating mess to eat. The only good thing about it was that it's a huge portion.
The mac and cheese...oh man where do I start....NOT GOOD. In fact, it was dried out so much from probably sitting there all night in a cup, pre-made, and when I finally got through the dried layer of macaroni, the cheese was so thick and lacked, once again, any salt or real levels of flavor. Kraft makes better M&C..lets be honest with ourselves people.
About the only thing I'd loved was the house hot sauce that they have on every table. Made most of my food tolerable to finish.
One last note: NO BBQ SAUCE at the table???

Strike 2
MUSIC:
I understand they want to continue with the southern BBQ smokehouse theme and play some "country music" for all of us in the background. Frankly, they should have just put a CD of Darius Rucker or Luke Bryan, or whomever on. You could barely hear them and when you did, they didn't sound like they were playing much of anything nor did they even sing. Seemed like they were mostly keeping beat/time and playing the same thing over and over.

Strike 3:
DRINKS
Got myself a "Havana Affair" and boy did it try to have an affair with my liver. WAY to strong and not enough lime/cola to cut through it all, while being inside of a tiny mason jar/mug. Bartenders could definitely use a refresher in pouring techniques/basics. Not sure why they think by making it stronger I'm going to buy more in the long run. Also, it would have been nice to see more iced / frozen drink options considering this place has no air conditioning, there's mobs of people around you, and when it was 101 degrees yesterday.

So in the end, I probably will not be rushing back to this place anytime soon or making any recommendations to my other friends to visit. With a few tweaks, Strand could be a great eatery/bar, but who knows when that will happen considering I'm review number 190.

I absolutely love the design of The Strand, which is why I've been four times now, despite my displeasure with the food. The outdoor, front seating area was so nice before the heat became sweltering, and the cafeteria-style inside allows tons of freedom to linger and not be disturbed by servers, plus the Southern-style drinks are delicious and creative. But...as a vegetarian with mostly carnivorous friends, I am continually coaxed to return and will have to say no next time, because the sides are atrocious. I always put on a brave face when meat-loving pals want to go to a BBQ joint, and tell myself it's more for the company than the food, but eating at The Strand is actually harmful to my health in a roundabout way...I end up eating nothing, and drinking just as much as my companions, which always hurts in the morning.

Why can't meat-centric restaurants make quality sides? They might think vegetarians aren't people they need to consider...or that we aren't people at all (Anthony Bourdain!!!)...but we do comingle with their meat-loving patrons, who are sometimes talked out of going to myopic establishments like The Strand. The mac and cheese is overcooked elbow noodles and American cheese slices congealed together...the worst I've ever had. The cole slaw has an extremely bitter taste and even more bitter aftertaste. The cornbread is dry. The corn-on-the-cob is fine. That's the only item I have to thank for hangovers that end at 3pm the next day rather than 9pm.

I don't expect BBQ proprietors to worry too much about those of us who can't eat their claims to fame, but completely ignoring us isn't cool, either.