Tuman's Tap and Grill

Te amo upgrade.

This is what I thought while coming back to Tuman's for the first time after an almost 5-year hiatus... also after, er... uhm... well... we'll just cal it a 'number' of alcoholic beverages at various locations where I admittedly only used the Spanish words 'Te' and 'Amo' because after several drinks it sounded like a jumbled version of the words 'Time' and 'To', and that's pretty much how 'Te amo upgrade' drunkenly translated into 'Time to upgrade'. So stupid. So stupid, but it's the only explanation I'm capable of at the momento... which I'm almost positive means 'moment' in Spanish. Still awaiting confirmation, though.

Sooo, I had a few. I don't speak Spanish. The 'lube-age' was liberal. And mostly, I just felt like Tuman's is better than the 3-star rating I'd formerly given them and the 3-star rating that their currently touting.

From the moment we walked in, Eli the door guy was a peachy pants. Bearing the cold winter night to check IDs and ensure all in the bar were safe and not over-served. There's ski-ball in the back along with a two other games, a really respectable beer menu, quite a few wines, some on point table service (even for a bar at midnight on a Saturday night) and a few pages of better-than-decent bar food.

I remember this being a borderline-dank dive bar about 5 years ago, tonight it had dark wood, a decent and well-behaved crowd and the very best beats, ala your 90s high school dances and your Pandora soundtrack from 6 months ago, you could have ever wished for. Mariah. The Lumineers. Faith Evans. Alexi Murdoch. Puffy. Etc. All that.

All that and an upgrade.

I went here in search of a decent meal before heading to the Empty Bottle on a weekend night.  I got that and more out of this place.

The food here was pretty fantastic, if you've never heard of "totchoes", you've gotta give them a try.  I'd put the rest of their food as upscale bar food, more fresh than frozen like so many other places.  The fries were pretty awesome, well seasoned and really hot coming out of the oven.  The beer menu had a ton of options as well, might be worth going back to check out some more of  the options.

I'd give Tuman's a 5-star rating except for the service.  I'll give a little break, because it seemed like the end of a very long day of drunken people, but until the major crowd left, we struggled to get noticed and had a bit more difficultly ordering food and drink that would have been ideal.  I'm sure I'll be back to see if it was an anomaly.

Try it for a beer and a nosh, tons of menu items to try!

So, the night I went to Tuman's was the eve of the first Hawks game after the NHL strike. As a result, the place was packed with drunk men all the aroma that results from hours of day drinking. Once they left, the place mellowed out a bit and we were able to enjoy our space a little better. Our waitress never made it over to our table even though the place was now pretty empty, so we went up to the bar to order our first round of drinks.

The beer list was extensive and had a nice range of quality beers to choose from. We all ordered different beers and really enjoyed them. After a while, we decided to order dinner and had to go to the bar again to put in our order. After about ten minutes, our waitress came over to apologize for not 'seeing us'. We weren't too upset about it, but it did take the place down to three stars from the possible four.

One other thing that knocked the fourth star off was a glitch with the women's bathroom. There was a leak in the pipes and water was coming down from the ceiling. The guy working on the bathroom told me about the problem and said he would guard the men's so I could use the washroom. That was fine with me, things happen. The second time I went back there though, no one was on bathroom patrol and when I came out of the stall a guy was in the urinal and when I walked out someone accused me of trying to skip a line by going in the men's. Pshh.

Our food came and we split Totchoes, Cumin rubbed chicken skewers, and the grilled cheese. All three were awesome, but the Totchoes stood out as the most delicious. I might head back just for these. A few other things sounded good, so I think I will head back again!

Not the best service, but good food and large beer selection.